‘La Tía Fúfula era’ the black sheep ‘de la familia’
“Grampo,” Canutito began una mañana, “Mi amigo; el Filimotas told me que en cada familia there is at least una black sheep. ¿Tenemos nosotros una borrega negra in our family? I mean, hay una persona who is really weird?”
Grampo Caralampio cleared his throat y luego dijo: “Ay m’hijo, es verdad. No hay such a thing como una familia perfecta. In our family la borrega negra era mi Tía Fúfula. Era una mujer muy grande pero since she always ate candy, she was sure que en otra vida she had been una sugar ant porque las hormiguitas comen mucha azúcar. Actually, I think que en otra encarnación she had been un dinosaur.
Ella era tan sneaky que she would come to each of us y secretamente she would whisper: ‘Tu eres mi nephew favorito but don’t tell any of the others’, de manera que she tricked a cada uno de nostros into thinking que we were the only favorite one. Ella era muy lépera.”
“What does ‘lépera’ mean, grampo?” Canutito asked him.
“Eso hace refer to a lady que es bien sneaky and conniving,” grampo said. “A veces La Tía Fúfula was hard to understand. Una vez she woke up de uno de sus naps que le gustan tomar in the afternoon. She announced: ‘Yo soñé cosas muy strange. In my dream, I dreamt que yo era un car muffler y cuando recordé, I woke up toda exhausted’.”
“Oh, I get it, grampo,” Canutito squealed. “Es porque exhaust sale de los mufflers! -That is weird. ¿What other kinds of strange things decía la Tía Fúfula?”
“Una vez when she was sitting en un banco over at the plaza, un muchacho kept dando la vuelta; just cruising around and around. She thought que he was checking her out y echándole el ojo. Since she thought que he was giving her the wandering eye, La Tía Fúfula turned to me y me dijo: ‘Ese guy quiere pie pero aquí no hay’.”
“Even de vieja, la Tía Fúfula thought que some dude wanted her?” Canutito laughed.
“Sí, m’hijo,” Grampo Caralampio replied. “She was quite la refranista; she had a bellyful of sayings. “Whenever she hadn’t seen a una persona por dos días she would always greet them con que: ¡‘no me tengas con la pena’!
“Uh, what does ¡‘no me tengas con la pena’! mean, grampo?” Canutito asked him.
“It means ‘don’t keep me in suspense o también it means ‘don’t make me get worried’. Es un sort of gentle way de regañar a la persona; es una manera suavecita of scolding someone.”
“La Tía Fúfula sounds como que era a real trip, grampo,” Canutito smiled.
“Nobody was free de su crítica, m’hijo,” Grampo Caralampio said. Un día a new priest came over to live aquí en esta parroquia. Cuando la Tía Fúfale saw him in this new parish, she said: ‘aquí vamos otra vez; cada cura con su locura’.”
“Here we go again, every priest with his own brand of madness,” Canutito translated.
“I think que I would have enjoyed getting to know a la Tía Fúfula, grampo,” said Canutito. “She sounds como si era una spark in the wind everywhere that she went.”
“Sí era una chispa pa’caminar,” Grampo Caralampio agreed. “Ella era una real crackpot bien echa. They don’t make them asina ya más.”
“I think que las otras personas de la familia were all the black sheep,” Canutito said. “La Tía Fúfula was probably la única que era normal among them…”