Mom, 63, wants to be a nurse, but kids don’t get it
Dear Annie: I am a 63year-old mother of two children in their 20s. I am still active, and I have attended a private vocational school for nursing. I did very well but, unfortunately, at graduation, we were cut off of our clinical hospital rotations due to COVID-19, which meant that we were unable to do our extern work or get our licenses.
Seven months later, I decided to complete another medical program so I can work in a doctor’s office as an extern.
The problem is that my children are fighting me on this issue. They say I’m wasting my time at my age and that the school would just be using me for money.
They say I should realize I’m older and, instead pursuing my career, just move into a rent-regulated senior apartment building instead.
My daughter says they are only trying to save me from making a fool of myself and wasting what money I have.
I don’t know at this point if maybe I’m not seeing reality or if the kids just want what’s convenient for them. — Frustrated Mom
Dear Frustrated Mom: Wasting money is never a good thing, but earning a nursing degree does not sound like a waste of money. In fact, it sounds like money well spent. Who can put a price tag on job fulfillment and self-esteem? If you feel called to be a nurse, that is something to be pursued by you and applauded and celebrated by your family. Not sure what is going on with your kids, but it sounds like you made a good decision.
Setting clear expectations
Dear Annie: My husband and I built a lovely home on a picturesque bubbling creek in the mountains. For years, we hosted friends and family and created memories to last a lifetime.
When we issued invitations, we added, “Please bring what you want to drink and any favorite snacks.” In addition, we said we have only one housekeeping request: “Fresh clean sheets are on the closet shelf. Please remake the bed before you leave.”
If anyone asked to bring fixings for a dinner or something to throw on the grill, or to take us out to dinner, we said, “Sure!”
All this made for a wonderful time for everyone, and we were never worn-out hosts. We also never detected any hint of dissatisfaction. Everyone who came always wanted to come back — and did many times. — Made It Clear
Dear Made It Clear: I love your letter. You took the initiative to set your ground rules from the beginning, and everyone agreed to them. That is the absolute best way to have a positive experience. It works in games — why wouldn’t it work in life? Thank you.