Feeling a bit married
We just passed a highwater mark, my wife and I. We’re at 48 years and counting. The younger years were exciting but the surprising thing now is how our marriage has matured like a fine wine. Some aspects of being married for decades is how so many things get better as time goes by.
In our early days, we never considered divorce. Murder, yes, but not divorce. The truth is, our marriage has worked because one of us decided to change to become compatible with the other one. Which one was it?
Well, my name was Wood. Her name was Stone. Which gets whittled on the easiest? Yep. The stone sharpened the knife. The steel blade began to cut on the wood. There’s less of me now than there was before. The fact is, most of us men weren’t ready for marriage. We men finish growing up when we take on the responsibility of having a wife and raising children. I discuss this more in my new book out for Father’s Day, “Powerful Fathers.”
Whose hand held the knife? God’s hand! He removed a lot of rough edges from me. He cut away dead wood, sawed off immaturity, and dug out my selfish roots. Though I like to say that it was me who decided that I loved her enough to change, God didn’t give me much of a choice. It was, “Treat her right or you’ll wish you had died!” I discovered she was her Father’s favorite. God wants His daughters cherished.
Did you hear about the man who heard a sermon on marriage? The preacher said the husband is supposed to be the head of the house. So, he went straight home and told his wife about this new truth. He declared, “I’m the new boss around here!” Strangely, he didn’t see his wife for a week. And then, just a little bit out of one eye…
Another man got excited when he read a verse in the Bible, something he rarely did. He found a verse about the man being the head over the woman. Not being very knowledgeable about the word’s context or how to rightly apply the truth (being unable to even pronounce “hermeneutics”), he took the verse to mean something it didn’t. He even bragged on his new power to his buddy at the bar, right before he went home to try it.
The next week, he was back at the bar again. His buddy asked him how it went.
“I had her down on her knees!” he said.
“What was she saying?” his buddy asked.
“She was saying, ‘Come out from under there, you coward!’”
I really do believe the Lord had a sense of humor when he joined together wood and stone. More than that, the Lord knew precisely what kind of partner I needed for a team-mate. I wasn’t smart enough to choose wisely so I had prayed for help.
I realize now more than ever that the Lord knew exactly what was good for me. God was an excellent matchmaker when he put the two of us into our double yoke. If I could send a letter back to the naïve, know-it-all, confident, skinny young preacher that was me at age 21, I’d say to him, “The best thing you ever did was to marry Lana!”
— Ron Wood is a writer and minister. Contact him at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit www.touchedbygrace.org. The opinions expressed are those of the author.