It’s Only My Opinion
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Thank the soap gods for DAYS, which continues to provide normalcy in these uncertain times.
■ These classic wedding episodes remind us why we fell for certain couples — and why some didn’t deserve our love.
■ I wasn’t a fan of Sam and Jason’s 2011 impromptu ceremony at a Chinese restaurant on GH, but in hindsight it echoed their unorthodox romance.
Jason: “This is my grandfor mother’s ring. She wore it over 50 years. My grandfato ther gave it to me to give you.”
Sam: “Your mother gave me this ring; it was your father’s. She said Alan would want you to have it and their love lasted a lifetime. So will ours.”
With the exception of a few bumps in the road (like Jason dying), it has. But “Jasam’s” vows brought up a continuity question: Where are those precious rings? When Sam remarried “Jason” (who later turned out to be Drew) in 2016, they exchanged different ones — wouldn’t Sam want Lila’s gold back on her finger? In 2017, Tracy made a point of giving Lila’s engagement ring to Ned to give to Olivia. (“My mother would prefer it be worn than kept in a dusty drawer,” Tracy told her son.) But in May 2020, Michael also gave Willow an engagement ring that he said belonged to his greatgrandmother. How many engagement and wedding rings did Lila have? Will Sam, Olivia and Willow get together at Thanksgiving in the Q living room and join their rings together to yell “It’s Morphin’ time!” before shifting into Turbo to burn the turkey?
Revisiting Carly’s marriage to Jax during Josslyn’s christening showed how that union pales in comparison to her high-voltage go-rounds with Sonny.
“Every single one of my dreams has come true and I have you to thank,” said Carly to Jax as she looked around the church for Sonny. He couldn’t make it because he was busy shooting his son Dante in the chest. Say what you want about life with the merry mobster, it’s never boring.
Elsewhere, we caught the aftermath of Elizabeth cheating on Lucky with his brother Nikolas from a compassionate Luke.
Luke: “That blow you dealt my son was pretty lethal. But people make mistakes. That doesn’t negate all the good you’ve done for Lucky through the years.”
Liz cheating with Nikolas did negate her long romance with Lucky, however. Lucky isn’t even a blip on her radar anymore; not even as Aiden’s dad. You can’t blame Liz for that, though. Soaps play a role in fans staying loyal to a couple, too, and GH stopped mentioning Lucky years ago.
Liz will need some quality flashbacks if he ever returns to complicate her life with Franco.
■ Y&R’S Chris and Paul got a whole week of flashbacks leading up to their 1996 nuptials.
Chris: “This ring is so beautiful, but I’m not sure ...”
Paul: “I love you. Whatever you decide, that won’t change.”
So if she said no, he’d be good? Chris and Paul’s starry romance always lightened the mood, but they didn’t have enough obstacles (or airtime) to make them a supercouple — they peaked when Phyllis planted the octopus in their bed. They still have lots of rooting value, though. Put them on opposite sides of a courtroom or have one of them hide a disease from the other and our interest will power right back up.
■ B&B celebrated its second “Love Conquers All” week, playing fast and loose with the word “all” since only one of the couples they showcased stayed married.
Wyatt (proposing to Hope):
“Let’s rock and roll. Aren’t you tired of the ups and downs? I can take that away from you. All you gotta say is one word.”
Hope: “Yes.”
They took the plunge in August 2014 (literally), but Hope asked for a divorce in March 2015. So we’ll call that marriage “Love Conquers Seven Months.”
Maya and Rick split offscreen, Ridge and Caroline split and then she died, Hope and Liam divorced, suffered a baby switch and later reunited. But give it up for Eric and Quinn, who are still together: Love Conquers Four Years!
May I suggest “In-law Sex Week”? Brooke seducing Eric, his son Thorne, his son Ridge, Ridge’s half brother Nick, her daughter Bridget’s husband Deacon, her daughter Hope’s boyfriend Oliver, and her sister Katie’s husband Bill. I’m serious — I would watch that. Come to think of it, make it two weeks!
■ Thank the soap gods for DAYS, which continues to provide normalcy in these uncertain times. And by “normal” I mean Eli and Lani’s wacky wedding.
Those two definitely deserve our love after that smorgaskristen bord of disaster.
First up: Fugitive dressed in a nun’s habit.
Lani: “Did you go back to the convent?”
Kristen: “I needed a disguise to sneak into town.”
Abe (later): “Did I just see a nun run down the hallway?”
No wonder there’s so much crime in Salem — Abe was police commissioner! He couldn’t catch Kristen but he did get caught bad-mouthing fussy Julie.
Abe: “As lovely as she is, she can be a huge pain in the ... look who’s here: Julie!”
Marlena: “Dearly beloved ...”
Pause when Tamara fainted, pause again when Gabi stormed in, enter the fugitive Vivian Alamain waving a gun.
Vivian: “I wasn’t invited, so I had no choice but to crash.”
Guess they should have sent her invitation care of Ivan ....
Rafe subdued Viv and carted her off, Lani and Eli jumped the broom (well done, DAYS) and Marlena pronounced them husband and wife. I think those crazy kids are going to make it, but all that drama really took it out of the hostess.
Julie: “I don’t think I’m going to book weddings here anymore.”
Say it ain’t so! How can Ciara and Ben have a classic Salem ceremony if no one pulls a gun?
■ Hey. It’s only my opinion.