Man’s behavior puts future in doubt

Dear Abby: A few months ago, I started dating a widower. He is a really great guy, and he seems perfect for me. I’m divorced, and my adult children live in other states. We have many shared interests and have a lot of fun together.

I noticed early on that he is very emotional, but occasionally, he seems to have manic episodes where he works himself nearly to death, doesn’t eat or sleep much and then abruptly leaves. I know bipolar disorder isn’t simple to diagnose. I just wonder if this relationship has a chance.

I don’t think he is dangerous, but I am a no-drama type, so I’m wondering if

I should let him go, even though it would be hard to do.

Seeing Signs In Michigan

Dear Seeing Signs: If what you have written is accurate, you have seen this man only during his “highs” — but not during his lows. Because bipolar illness can be treated, IF the person is willing to admit they “may” have a problem, it would be wise to discuss this with him when he’s in a normal phase and suggest that he be screened. If he refuses, then might be the time to rationally decide whether to let him go.

Dear Abby: I have two beautiful daughters from a previous marriage. My ex and I get along well (better as friends than partners) and do things as often as possible with the girls, which includes travel. We usually take one to two trips a year. The girls love it, and so do we.

I am now remarried. My wife has a hard time with the traveling, and we have had many fights about it. She would like both families to travel together, but my girls don’t want that. My ex’s

mom has just booked a trip to Hawaii and is willing to pay for me to go. My wife said absolutely not. These trips are the only real quality time I have with the girls. What should I do?

Packed And Ready

Dear Packed: It’s wonderful that you and your ex-wife enjoy an amicable relationship, but the time has come for you to stand up for the woman to whom you are presently married. She should have been welcomed on those trips right after the two of you made it official, and you should have made that clear.

I don’t blame your wife for being upset at this point. I would be, too. You should encourage your wife to come, too — and devote some time to being with her.