Wedding upcoming, nightmare begins Diet, fiber help against gallstones
Dear Amy: My daughter is getting married in a year. The wedding is a long way off, but the nightmares are already beginning.
My daughter isn’t the problem, but my mother is! When I got married my mother informed me it was NOT my wedding, but a celebration she was putting together and therefore she would call all the shots. Now she is starting this with my daughter.
We live about 2,000 miles away from my mom, at my husband’s insistence. My daughter flew there to check out a grad program and stayed with my mom. While there, mom took her dress shopping and BOUGHT her dress. It is not even something my daughter likes, so I called the shop later, and the dress was canceled.
Right now, my daughter and her fiancé want to elope. I’m fine with that but I know my daughter wants a nice wedding with family. I told her that if they want to elope I will support that and we’ll have a HUGE reception when they return.
I feel they are being shortchanged, but no one can stand mom’s interference. Trust me, if you knew her, you would know there is no talking to her. What can we do? — Desperate
Dear Desperate: Your daughter and her guy should have the wedding they want to have, without interference from her grandmother, or you. So far, you seem to be a prime mover regarding your daughter’s plans — calling to cancel her dress and communicating your own interpretation of what your daughter wants.
So yes, elopement might be the best idea for them, but if they do decide to host a wedding, the couple should not share any details with your mother (nor should you discuss this wedding with her).
They should limit their communication with her to an invitation.
Dear Dr. Roach: I am blessed to be a very healthy 63-year-old woman. I am a vegetarian who eats fish occasionally. I take 600 mg of calcium a day, along with 1 mg folic acid for thalassemia minor. I exercise every day. I sleep well. I feel great and full of energy.
I have diverticulosis due to pockets in my colon, but I have never had an attack. The doctor told me to start taking a fiber supplement. I also found out that, based on my bilirubin numbers and an ultrasound, I have Gilbert syndrome.
I have asked my doctors if there is anything else I need to do to stay healthy. They normally say, “Keep doing what you are doing!” Any additional advice, Dr. Roach? Regarding the Gilbert syndrome, are there certain foods I should avoid, and could I end up with gallbladder problems? — S.M.
Gilbert syndrome is a genetic defect in the metabolism of bilirubin, a bile salt. It normally has no symptoms, and is detected due to abnormally high levels of bilirubin in the blood. People with this condition are at higher risk for developing gallstones. This is particularly an issue for you, since you also have thalassemia minor. The thalassemias are a group of diseases related to abnormalities in the hemoglobin protein. The blood cells of people with even these minor abnormalities are more likely to break apart, which causes the body to break down hemoglobin, one result of which is increased bilirubin. So, you have two reasons for high bilirubin and a higher likelihood of gallstones.
Your diet choices have protected you. Only meat products contain cholesterol, which also increases risk for gallstones. Fiber, which is certainly good for people with diverticulosis, is also good for preventing gallstones. So, I echo your previous doctors: Keep doing what you’re doing.