Gram strains family by asking for money Reader is sweating over lack of sweat

Dear Amy: My 90-year-old grandmother is a truly awful human being. She has alienated her entire family. She’s lost countless friends and ruined relationships

My mother refers to her as a sociopath, and my uncles and aunts say they cannot wait for the day that she eventually passes.

While she’s typically invited to family functions, she has not attended in years.

When my sister (who is gay) got married a few years ago, my grandmother was invited, and chose not to attend. Instead, she sent my sister and her new wife a pamphlet on sexually transmitted diseases enclosed in a sympathy card. At that point, I was fully done with her, as was my sister.

My grandmother has run out of money in recent years. Her children were all contributing to a monthly account for her, but after discovering that she was spending most of this money on shopping and casino trips, they all stopped.

My sister and I both received a letter in the mail from my grandmother pleading for money, and explaining how dire her financial situation was.

I really want tell her what I think of her. The other part of me wants to show compassion. I certainly will not be giving her any money, but I feel that I should respond.

What do you think? — Unsure Grandchild

Dear Unsure: Before you respond, ask yourself: “What good would it do?” If it would somehow benefit her, you, and others to lay out with complete honesty how reprehensible her behavior has been over the years, then do that.

Otherwise, you could try a simple, more compassionate, but also truthful response: “Dear Gran, I received your letter. I’m sorry you are in this position. Unfortunately, I cannot be part of your solution. ”

Dear Dr. Roach: I am an elderly woman who has never perspired and would like to know why. Heat makes me very sick. — P.M.

The name for the condition of no sweating at all is anhidrosis, and there are several causes. There are rare conditions people are born with. However, nearly all of these rare diseases have other significant symptoms you don’t mention.

Damage to sweat glands can be seen in autoimmune diseases and diseases that can destroy sweat glands. None of these is likely. Likewise, you don’t mention medications, which may have lack of sweating as a side effect.

I suspect you don’t have a diagnosable disease but rather that you are on the far end of the normal range for sweating. Just as there are people who get drenched with sweat in mildly warm weather, there are some who sweat very little.

Avoiding hot weather is wise. Sun protection is also wise, as is making sure you have enough fluids.

Dear Dr. Roach: I am a 25-year-old man who was diagnosed with osteoporosis at age 18. It is most likely due to inhaled steroids for childhood asthma. With six years of exercise, vitamin D and calcium, my bone density is normal in some areas and osteopenia in others. I also have male pattern baldness.

I do not want to compromise my bones, but also not lose my hair. — J.D.

Finasteride and dutasteride work by blocking an enzyme that converts testosterone to dihydrotestosterone. Testosterone is an important hormone, and it promotes bone mass. Low testosterone is one of the conditions your endocrinologist would have checked you for. Dihydrotestosterone has few physiological effects.

The effect of finasteride and dutasteride on bone density has been tested. The evidence is pretty strong that neither reduces bone density.