Thanksgivings past are this year’s repast

Dear Amy: As Thanksgiving approaches and we are setting the table for three instead of 14, I took a moment for a reality check.

I remembered when my daughters were in college and clued me into the Wednesday night tradition of going to a bar to fortify oneself.

I rememberedthose disastrous Thanksgivings, with the barbecued turkey.

Or the year the dining room table, extended with all its leaves, started to sag in the middle.

I remembered the horrendous travel problems.

Perhaps, it will be a good year to quietly laugh at those Thanksgivings past and accept the pause in the tradition this year.

And thank you, Amy, for all the wisdom and compassion you dish out! — Thankful

Dear Thankful: Your beautiful note perfectly conveys the complicated feelings many Americans are having this Thanksgiving.

Your email also arrived on the morning ofmy Aunt Jean’s death. Because of the pandemic, her daughters could only visit her through a window until hospice care liberated them.

Aunt Jeanwas the last of the legendary “Mighty Queens of Freeville,” four fierce and funnywomen whose influence shows up in this column.

And Aunt Jean always made the gravy.

Yes, the groaning feast table will be much lighter this year. But I hope your message will inspire families to count our many blessings, remember with joy those who can’t be with us, and promise to put aside our differences.

This year, as I do every year, I will be at the little church in my hometown, cooking and serving aThanksgiving meal to people who would not have one, otherwise. We’re doing a “take out” service, and I’ll be making the gravy.