She’s not a Bridezilla, but might be a Friendzilla

Dear Amy: In March of 2020, I got married.

I was considered a Bridezilla (I disagree); I was just very set on planning my wedding with my husband, and we didn’t want suggestions.

I have seen my own family and friends settle for what those around them wanted.

My two best friends since junior high school made it very clear what I should or shouldn’t do.

I was very clear with them that my husband and I were planning our wedding together, without other input.

The day of wedding, it was a mess. My wedding planner never showed up.

I was told both of my friends were upset at me for not making either of them my maid of honor.

They decided that it was OK to talk smack about me.

I’m over the friendship with them both.

At this point, my question is should I pursue a friendship with them, or should I just let a 25-year friendship go?

It’s been over a year and I have only talked to one and she’s just using me to vent.

What should I do? — Anonymous Ex-friend

Dear Anonymous: Iam surprised that, having experienced a global pandemic that has exposed all of us to actual life-and-death decisions you are still replaying your disappointment from last year.

If you want to try to move your junior high relationships into the adult realm, then you should start by behaving like a, considerate, authentic adult.

If it’s true that these friends were trashing you, then you should assume that they don’t necessarily wish you well. Would an explanation or apology help? If so, be brave enough to ask for it.