Quick meal not so happy after all

Dear Amy: I get along with a male co-worker fairly well, and we go out to lunch at least twice a week. I honestly have never thought anything of it past a mutual work relationship. He’s 12 years older than I am. I am married, and he has been with his significant other for almost nine years.

There is a fast-food spot we go to often that we both love. The girls who work there know us and are quite friendly.

The other day I went there by myself and one of the girls asked where my “boyfriend” was.

I made it clear to her that he is just a coworker, and she told me he refers to me as his “girlfriend.”

He expenses all of our meals; our company allows anyone who is salaried to expense one meal a day under $15, so he’s technically NOT paying for me! How can I confront him about this without causing trouble in the office? — Upset

Dear Upset: You should consider laughing about this. This option does not seem to have occurred to you. Your colleague is not technically paying for your lunch (the company is), but how is the server supposed to know this?

And is it possible that your colleague referred to you as his “girlfriend” because you are a woman, and also a friend?

You know the nature of your work-friendship better than I do, but many people have close office friendships that become “spouselike.” That’s where the term, “work-wife” (or husband) comes from.

The best way for you to deal with this is to frame this issue as a question, versus a confrontation.

Say, “Dude, the server said you referred to me as your girlfriend! My husband would be pretty surprised by that. You were just joking, right?”

Dear Amy: Thank you for encouraging “Wondering” to contact his high school crush after their recent reunion. I’m happy to say that I reconnected with a crush at our reunion, and if he hadn’t been brave enough to follow up, we wouldn’t be enjoying a happy late-life marriage today! — Crushed

Dear Crushed: Judging by the contents of my mailbag, high school reunions are the source of many reconnections. I’m happy yours is a happy one.