Rent-less son could become house sitter

Dear Amy: My husband and I are retired. We own two homes — one in the north, one in the south. Our 40-year-old son still lives with us up north.

We spend about six months of the year in each place. We are covering all expenses for our son. We pay heat, electric, water, cable, insurance, landscaping, etc.

He does not contribute financially in any way. He has worked full-time since graduating college.

It is comforting to have someone in the house while we are gone. He does take care of things if a need arises. When we return, however, I have to deep-clean the place and my husband becomes 24-hour gardener to restore the home to how it was when we left.

I strongly feel that my son should be contributing financially and doing some chores.

I think he should be paying rent.

We love our son dearly and do not want to hurt or alienate him.

Can you help resolve this dilemma? — Frustrated Mom

Dear Frustrated: Your son should be paying rent during the six months when you are all in the house together. His rent should be reduced or eliminated during the time he is house-sitting for you.

Many people hire seasonal house sitters.

In terms of you returning home to face many large tasks, he is 40 years old! He should help with cleaning and do all of the yard work, and yes, you should return to a house (basically) as clean as you left it.I’m guessing you have never made this expectation clear to him.

It sounds as if you just don’t want to live with your son.You could suggest he move out altogether, or look into a sixmonth furnished rental during the summer (when you’re in the house) and then move into your home in the winter.