Neighbors overhear verbal elder abuse

Dear Amy: Our house is 20 feet from the next house.

Pre-pandemic, we knew our next-door neighbors by name and exchanged greetings.

The neighbors are an elderly gentleman, being cared for by his elderly daughter. She had mentioned that her father suffers from dementia. Her father is physically impaired and dependent on a walker.

Since reducing our world to the confines of our house and backyard, we hear the daughter screaming at her father at the top of her lungs, almost daily, early in the morning.

She uses epithets and sounds verbally abusive.

He is visited by a home health care aide several times a week. We think we may be the only people who know about this behavior.

Is there anything you would recommend that we can do? — Worried Neighbors

Dear Worried: Every state has a mandated office of

Adult Protective Services (APS). APS is a social service program authorized by law to receive and investigate reports of elder or vulnerable adult maltreatment, and to intervene to protect the victims.

Your county or town should have an affiliated agency that handles cases such as you describe. Please call and report exactly what you know. A social worker will follow up.

The elderly caregiver in this situation is no doubt very stressed. Her father might be hard of hearing (which might necessitate that she raise her voice). But no amount of stress or deafness justifies disrespect and verbal abuse.

You are witnesses to this abuse, and you must make the call. A case worker will assess the situation, and if they need more help or respite care, they might be able to receive it.

An internet search will reveal the office closest to you.