The new words we need now Pro-choice versus pro-life

In 1879, when dropout-turned-linguistic genius James Murray was assembling the Oxford English Dictionary, he asked citizens to send him words he might have missed.

In a dictionary definition of “better late than never-ism,” here you go, James:

T’weed: Cannabis used in a legal, professorial or corporate setting.

Eloncholy: To feel sad after offering to buy something you don’t really want.

Tom and Jerrymandering: Zoning laws applied in such a way as to destroy the other party, while affecting an air of goofy innocence.

OK-Pop: “OK, boomer” for aged-out Korean pop stars.

Microboasting: Small boasts that have a big impact, e.g., “I didn’t have enough to buy a car in 2012, so I bought Bitcoin.”

Taxiomatic: Something that is always true in taxis, e.g., the air-conditioning will not reach the back seat; the driver will be harder working and lower paid than you, causing quiet guilt; that guilt will be assuaged and in fact reversed when the driver speeds you over to 80th St. after mishearing “18th St.,” etc.

Phonatical: The state of being unable to resist looking at one’s phone seconds after putting it away, often directly after ascertaining no one has texted, called, emailed, WhatsApped or contacted you on any media platform about anything at all.

Postulate: To form a rabidly held conviction on either side of the political spectrum, based solely on the editorials in the New York or Washington Post.

Egg Roll/Coke/Wonton Soup: To get something “free” that is not actually free, but subtly included in the purchase price. (See also “gift with purchase,” “Happy Meal,” etc.)

Super-Intendo: Building handyman who actually responds with tools, towels and a smile when chunks of plaster are falling on the bed or the toilet won’t stop flushing.

Gum-blinded: Any poster wherein the characters’ pupils have been partly or completely obscured by wads of chewed gum. (See also gumnosed, gum-toothed, gum-gummed.)

Dunkin’! 1) To be everywhere at once, ubiquitous. “Suddenly, pickleball is so Dunkin’!” 2) To be unstoppable, powerful. “Scientists fear the newest COVID-19 variant could be Dunkin’!” 3) To be in excess, superfluous. “Starbucks is so Dunkin’!”

Veganomics: The economic theory that as vegans buy ever more beans and lentils, the price of chicken and beef will fall for the rest of us. Crapto: Blockchain currency in the toilet.

Mr. Potato Neck: A bad idea from the start. (See also “Shark-bait Surfboard.”)

Gurdle: Popular word game only played while wearing Spanx.

Spinx: Shapewear for cats.

Now abortion law is up to states. Some will ban it, while most blue states will allow it in some form.

Because libertarians want government out of our lives, people assume we are prochoice. Some of us are. But like the rest of America, there are principled libertarians on both sides.

We freedom-lovers believe women (and men) own their bodies and should have control over what happens to them.

But we also believe that one of the few legitimate roles for government is stopping murder. If a fetus is a life, abortion is legally murder.

“Life begins from the moment conception is complete,” says Kerry Baldwin, host of the “Dare to Think” Podcast. “Abortion is murder.”

“The termination of a pregnancy is the right of any woman,” counters pro-choice Avens O’Brien of Feminists for Liberty.

I say to O’Brien, “That is a form of life in the womb. You’re not bothered terminating that?”

“I’m not sure I agree that it’s a person with rights,” she responds.

“At what point does the baby have a right to be protected by the state?” I continue. “You’re saying that one minute before birth, the baby does not, and one minute after, it does?”

“Individuals have rights,” she responds. “Individuals don’t exist inside other people.”

Baldwin counters, “Passing through the birth canal doesn’t change the humanity of the fetus.”

“As long as a fetus is inside a person, the person gets to determine whatever’s happening to it,” answers O’Brien.

Baldwin says the only time abortion should be legal is if a woman’s life is in danger. Rape is not justification. Rape, she says, is “a crime against women. They need restitution for that crime,” but the woman must carry the baby to term.

Baldwin is libertarian, so she usually opposes government force. I point out that abortion bans are government force.

“It is the role of civil governance to criminalize acts of violence,” she replies.

I wonder how such criminalization would work.

“If abortion is illegal,” I point out, “the state either has to punish the woman or doctor or both.”

“This is a woman who’s in crisis,” says Baldwin. “It doesn’t make sense to ... throw her in prison.”

Before Roe v. Wade, prosecuting women was rare. Sometimes doctors were prosecuted.

“The way you enforce is not through a police state,” says Baldwin. “The way to get women to stop choosing abortion is to provide other options.” One such option, she says, is to make adoption easier.

Easier adoption would be good, but it certainly won’t persuade all women to carry babies to term.

Watching this week’s abortion protests, one thing puzzles me: Why do activists always turn to politics?

Celebrities like Lady Gaga and Rihanna attacked Alabama’s abortion bill. “Governor ... SHAME ON YOU,” said Rihanna.

Instead of shouting at politicians, activists could put their money where their mouths are.

I say to Baldwin and O’Brien, “Lady Gaga and Rihanna by themselves have enough money to fly every woman ... to a state where it’s legal. Why is this a government issue?”

“It would be great if celebrities spent their money on mutual aid and direct action instead of lobbying politicians,” says O’Brien.

“Currently there is a meme going around,” she adds. “People write, ‘If anyone needs to go camping because their state does not allow camping ... come camping with me. We’ll never talk about your camping.’”

Why “camping” instead of “abortion”?

Because in “certain states, that would create a legal problem,” explains O’Brien.

The two sides will never agree about abortion.

Personally, I think it’s reasonable when states ban lateterm abortion. An 8-monthold fetus sure seems like life to me.

But I’m mostly pro-choice. People should own their own bodies. If someone lives inside you, you have a right to control that life.

John Stossel is creator of Stossel TV and author of “Give Me a Break: How I Exposed Hucksters, Cheats, and Scam Artists and Became the Scourge of the Liberal Media.” For other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit www.creators.com.