Sideline Chatter
Oh, son, you shouldn’t have!
Nine MLB players homered on both Mother’s and Father’s Day this year—including three dingers each by the D-backs’ Paul Goldschmidt, the Cardinals’ Yadier Molina, the Astros’ George Springer and the Rockies’ Pat Valaika.
Did I do that?
Cavs star LeBron James vehemently denied that, when he bolted Cleveland for Miami in 2010, he started the so-called super-team era in the NBA. Somewhere, Steve Urkel is chuckling.
Sports quiz
Jeter Downs is: a) a shortstop named for Derek Jeter who was drafted by the Reds b) a new Thoroughbred racetrack in the Bronx c) the latest thing A-Rod tested positive for
Needling Brady
Pats QB Tom Brady, making a visit to Japan, grappled with a sumo wrestler and then posed for a picture with a few of them, TMZ reported. The photo made Tom look, shall we say, a tad underinflated.
No more onion rings
McDonald’s is calling a halt to its Olympic Games partnership. Apparently the IOC refused to replace its “Faster, Higher, Stronger” motto with “Super-Size Those Thighs.”
Help wanted
The Discovery Channel signed up Michael Phelps to race a great white shark. Now comes the tough part—finding someone to collect the shark’s postrace urine sample.
Shanked that one
Fox broadcaster Joe Buck was given some bad intel and announced the wrong girlfriend for U.S. Open winner Brooks Koepka. Hurriedly added to the postmatch media buffet: mulligan stew.
Just call him J-Z’s
An unnamed top-15 draft pick told ESPN that Knicks president Phil Jackson kept nodding off during his workout. Who says New York is the city that never sleeps?
What’s shakin’?
Hold that line? No kidding. The Hayward Fault branch of the San Andreas Fault runs directly beneath Memorial Stadium in Berkeley.
Talking the talk
—Patriots receiver Chris Hogan, to MSN. com, on his game plan after becoming a first-time father—twice over: “It’s straight man-to-man coverage with twins.” —Headline at TheKicker.com: “Umps go to video replay to see if they’re slowing game down too much.”
How cheesy
A die-hard Green Bay Packers fan married a woman named Maria Packer and took her last name. That’s what you call taking a Lambeau Leap of Faith.
Envelope, please
The NBA announced it will honor Bill Russell—winner of 11 championships in 13 seasons—with its first Lifetime Achievement Award. Next up: a Nighttime Achievement Award for Wilt Chamberlain’s little black book?
Killer B’s, the sequel
A giant swarm of bees interrupted one of the Dolphins’ minicamp practices. In an odd twist, team trainers reported no stingers.
In Wolves’ clothing
Bulls star Jimmy Butler was in France watching the Paris fashion shows when he learned he’d been traded to the Timberwolves. Hey, what better place to discover you’ll be needing a change of uniform?
More headlines
—At TheOnion.com: “Stephen A. Smith reveals he still meets up with Skip Bayless to argue.”
Bun voyage?
Virginia shooting guard Kyle Guy lopped off his trademark man bun but says he might grow it back some day. So don’t go saying his bun is one-and-done just yet.
Letting her hair down
Nigerian long-jump champ Blessing Okagbare lost her wig when she landed in the sand at a Diamond League meet in Oslo, Norway, but immediately picked it up and put it back on. Coincidence? She’s suddenly scratching a lot more often.
They do run-run
Take five? No kidding. The Orioles broke an American League record by allowing five or more runs in 17 consecutive games.
You go so-long
Receiver Jeremy Maclin says he found out he’d been released when Chiefs GM John Dorsey left a voicemail. Which certainly gives a whole new meaning to “calling an audible.”
Quote marks
—Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) WorldHerald, on UFC champ Joanna Jedrzejczyk: “‘Jedrzejczyk’ looks like something I ended up with last time I tried to work The New York Times crossword puzzle.” —Reds speedster Billy Hamilton, to MLB. com, after finally getting tagged out by Rays left fielder Mallex Smith in a 6-5-2-4-5-7 rundown between third and home: “They brought one of their fast guys in.” —RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com, after an Atlanta cheerleader uncorked a record 44 consecutive back handsprings: “It all started with a rumor Tom Brady was out for the season.”
Political football
Jim Harbaugh plans to make Barack and Michelle Obama honorary captains for a Michigan home game. Overheard in Columbus: “Uh, coach Meyer, there’s a Mr. Trump holding on Line 2.”
The write stuff
—Brad Rock of Salt Lake City’s Deseret News, after “Dumb and Dumber” star Jeff Daniels scored a hole-in-one: “Yup. He’s sayin’ he had a chance.” —Comedy writer Alex Kaseberg, after the pilot avoided injury when a one-man blimp crashed and burned near the U.S. Open at Erin Hills: “However the blimp, the Spirit of Tiger Woods, was totaled.” —Mike Bianchi of the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel, on the U.S. Open scores this year: “Erin Hills isn’t just playing easy, it’s more forgiving than the Tallahassee Police Department.”