Boyfriend’s sister is belittling

I’ve been with my boyfriend, “Jake,” for two years. We are both 32. Since the beginning, his sister, “Michelle” (who is 26), has never liked me. Jake admits there’s no reason for it. He thinks she’s just looking out for him because he’s had bad relationships in the past.

Michelle makes me very uncomfortable during family events by making rude comments, and she makes a point of excluding me from any event she is hosting. She has told people that I “shoved her” and accuses me of refusing to let her talk to her brother. Neither is true.

I have asked Jake to ask his sister to apologize and make amends, but he insists she’ll do it when “hell freezes over.” He thinks I should try to make amends even though I have never done anything wrong.

I’m at a loss. I don’t think I should apologize for something I’ve never done. Abby, she has belittled me in any encounter HOROSCOPE

(March 21-April 19). Are you going to do what you said you would do? That’s all they care about today. Hopefully, you underestimated what you would do, and the delivery will be over your promise.

(April 20-May 20). You might be very bored with what’s going on today, and that’s really just a challenge to look a little deeper. There’s always a pretty thing to be admired, a problem to be solved. There’s always a day to be made.

(May 21-June 21). When you don’t exactly know how to manage what’s going on down low, look up high. Is there a higher thought that resonates with you? A guide, a cloud formation, a sky that speaks to you?

(June 22-July 22). Small thinkers will go disguised as “reasonable” people. They may tell you about limits that are true for them, but that does not mean that the same rules apply to you.

(July 23-Aug. 22). The market is calling you. You’ve something to sell, and they definitely want it. How will you position this? Knowable, likeable, trustable: You’re all these things.

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22). Something you set up one way will end up another. There is nothing reasonable you can do about this. Settle in. That is just another way of saying, “Chill.” It’s going to work when you calm down.

(Sept. 23-Oct. 23). “With liberty and justice for all”: Well, that’s a big statement with a big meaning. Your sign of balance and fairness, you really get that, live it and mean it. What are you going to do about it today?

(Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Your plans are solid, we’ve had. The rest of the family shrugs and says, “That’s just the way she is.” Michelle has never liked any of Jake’s girlfriends, so this seems to be a pattern for her. I’m afraid it will eventually lead to the end of Jake’s and my relationship.

I love him very much, and I wish he could see my side on this. Could you please give me some advice, Abby? — Not My Fault in Alberta, Canada

Michelle’s fixation on her brother isn’t normal or healthy. That Jake has been willing to tolerate it and not warn her to knock it off means that as long as you are with him, you will be subjected to her mistreatment. My advice is to cut your losses.

Contact www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069. Can't get enough advice? Find more columns from Carolyn Hax and other columnists on advice.azcentral.com. meaning that nothing has been left to chance — but chance doesn’t like that at all. This is the time she will rebel, elbowing her way into the equation.

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21). The dynamic between two people is compelling. Fake or real — it depends a lot on the medium. Of the ones you observe now, you’re wise to be a little skeptical.

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19). There is safety in being shy. If you feel like hiding, it’s a signal that you will benefit by doing the opposite. Take one step forward. Put yourself out there, even if it feels foolish.

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18). You sought a position in the middle because you thought it would be logical and easier, but it wasn’t. There is no middle. It’s always the start of something or the end of something.

(Feb. 19-March 20). Life is an experiment. No one ever really knows how a choice will turn out; they just get adept at playing their odds. And the only way to do that is by building experiences — choosing and then choosing again.

(Sept. 27). You can’t help who you are. That’s the sad way to look at it. Who you are is a gift. That’s the happy way. This is your year to start making good on all those things you thought were “different” or “flawed,” because it turns out that those are your assets. Lean into it. December and June will be your best months financially. Libra and Capricorn adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 30, 1, 11, 13, 29 and 4. 9 14 15 16 17 19 20 21 22 23 25 26 27 30 33 34 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 44 45 46 groundhog Pretty in Paris Mayberry kid Hagar’s daughter Banded gem All the time (hyph.) Glossy Comic-strip prince Vast ages Farrier Shut the gate Do pull-ups Produce eggs Mention (2 wds.) Bwana, in India Kevin in “Dave” Groovy Melville novel Like good soil Focal points Sauce in a wok Formation flier Mural undercoat Bar entertainment Colorful carp Pays for Guest accommodation 54 55 57 58 59 60 61 62 Cruise port Eccentric Michael Caine role Mystique Hershiser of baseball Jockey, often Keg Brit’s radial DOWN 1 Devoted 2 Met offering 3 Economy-size 4 Always, to Poe 5 Rats! 6 Pursue relentlessly Quaint lodgings Ceiling Creamy blossom Staring rudely Cafe au — Problem with hives A mouse! Post-op therapy Bright Ad award 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 18 22 24 09-27-16 25 Whodunit start 27 Jaded 28 Alien tour buses? 29 Felt boots 30 Plea at sea 31 Out of control 32 Georgetown athlete Flakes Personal history Bonkers Anakin’s daughter More clumsy Succeed (2 wds.) 33 35 37 38 40 41 43 44 46 47 48 Rent-sharer Ferocious bear Disparages Noah or Wallace “Oklahoma!” aunt 49 Arthur Conan

— 50 Port near Kilauea Klutzes Blue-green hue — de mer Pouch Become moldy 51 52 54 55 56