The Arizona Republic

Mom wants the right day care

- Dear Abby: Dear New Mom: Dear Abby: Dear Gun-Shy: are To write to Holiday Mathis, visit www.creators. com/author/holiday-mathis and click “Contact.”

I am a new mom to a sweet baby boy. I am (or was) very career-oriented and never in a million years thought I would want to be a stayat-home mom. I will have to return to work shortly, and I’m really struggling.

I have a hard time putting my little one in day care, but I don’t have a choice. I have no idea where to begin, how to select the right day care or what questions to ask. Any assistance would be greatly appreciate­d. — New Mom in California

Start by talking to your friends and family, asking if they know of a day care that’s good, then make sure that any facility you’re considerin­g is licensed. Spend a little time there to see how the caregivers interact with the children.

Go to babycenter.com and search on “daycare.” You will find a section on day care centers that will give you the informatio­n you need. You should also check HOROSCOPE

(March 21-April 19). By definition, work is harder than doing nothing at all. At least it should be. Then why doesn’t it feel as if that is true? You’ll find idleness to be an irritant and gladly take on more than your share to stay busy.

(April 20-May 20). One of the more difficult character challenges of the day will be in the practice of nonjudgmen­t. To take things at face value is difficult for one with the in-depth knowledge that you have, but you won’t be sorry.

(May 21-June 21). Get going on a project. It doesn’t matter where you start; it just matters that you do. Wrong choices lead to right ones; bad plans lead to better ones.

(June 22-July 22). You’re the unofficial coach of your group. You won’t let anyone perform at a subpar level without taking it upon yourself to investigat­e the problem, fix it and motivate improvemen­t.

(July 23-Aug. 22). This is a time to keep as much of the project under your control and jurisdicti­on as you can. If you delegate too much, you’ll just have to do it over yourself.

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22). You don’t like to put people out, but if they want to make a sacrifice on your behalf, let them. You are important to your people. They want you to know this. Let them show you.

(Sept. 23-Oct. 23). Who should be fulfilling your expectatio­n? Whose expectatio­n should you be filling? If the answers to those questions are “nobody” and “nobody’s,” then you’ll have an excellent day indeed.

(Oct. 24-Nov. 21). Things will not stay the with your state’s department of social services to be sure no complaints have been filed.

Over the years the people closest to me (immediate family, friends and a few ex-boyfriends) have given me every reason not to trust anyone much.

About a year ago I found the courage to date again and met a man who gives me every reason to trust him to the fullest. The problem is, because of my past, I’m having problems doing it. How do I move past my issues? — Gun-Shy in Maine

Don’t be afraid to talk things out with him rather than react by jumping to conclusion­s and/or making accusation­s.

Listen to what he says and watch what he does. If the two don’t match, regard it as a red flag. However, if they do match, then count your blessings because you may have finally found a winner.

Contact www.DearAbby.com way they are. They never have, and they never will. With this in mind, you’ll continue to look for the present opportunit­ies, which are as unusual as they are rare.

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21). In most things, the lows and highs will expand at the same time. In a related story, you’ll be reminded that the way to intelligen­t things is often found through silly things.

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19). You’re edgy; the pressure is on. Embrace it. Some top performanc­e coaches suggest that relaxation techniques only diminish your ability to connect. It’s more compelling to stay in the moment and use the energy.

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18). Over-planning leads to a boring outcome. But how do you know when you’ve planned too much?

(Feb. 19-March 20). You’ll be at your absolute best in a safe environmen­t where you’re not worried about being scored or judged. You can have that peace even if you being judged, by the way. The trick is in not worrying about it.

(Feb. 27). This solar return, you’ll step way out of the familiar and, upon returning, find new joy in the life you’ve built. Next month brings a favorable close to a longrunnin­g argument. Don’t work on improving relationsh­ips, as it will happen through play, travel and fun. July brings the chance to double down and win. Gemini and Leo adore you. Your lucky numbers are: 4, 38, 11, 19 and 26. 10 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 22 24 26 27 31 32 33 36 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 48 51 Sgt. Preston’s group Nina of fashion Post-kindergart­en Newsman — Abel Grouchy Muppet Fanatic’s feeling Blackberry stem Hotel-suite amenity (2 wds.) Crashes (2 wds.) Ballpoint point Wilts Chinese veggie (2 wds.) Place to stay Crewmate of Sulu Clumps of grass Dawn drops Calf-length Composer — Anderson Instance —’wester Microsurge­ry tool Zesty dip Director — Burns In worse taste Sudden pang Vocalist — Sumac 63 64 65 66 67 68 Old ruler of Venice Clock part Four-bagger Went swiftly This, to Pedro Ache DOWN 1 Snowball 2 Climb the ladder 3 Bank no. 4 Leave a mark 5 Amazon menace 6 — Perce tribe 7 Obi-Wan player 8 Pottery bit 9 Mirth 10 Guess 11 Jewelry fastener 12 Without 13 Quick look 21 Carioca’s city 23 Pros and — 25 Computer mouthfuls Mooches Great Lakes state 27 28 2-27-17 29 Striped antelope 30 Dernier — 34 Suffix for forfeit 35 — -niner 36 Melting-watch artist Latin I verb Get threadbare Tongue Ailurophob­e’s fear Hubble component Stiff 37 38 40 41 43 44 45 47 48 49 50 52 53 55 56 57 58 61 Greeted warmly Lb. or tsp. Crowd in Pie slice Sea eagles Profs, probably Iowa, to Jacques Soothing herb Comet’s gaseous cloud Hardly — “Silent Running” actor Time span

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