More facts

Commonly, people call gastrointestinal upsets the flu, when the fact is, influenza is respiratory; there’s no throwing up or diarrhea involved. If that’s what’s afflicting you, it may be a different viral or bacterial infection.

Myth No 1:

Flu only happens in the winter. Nope. Although the frequency of infections increases in October and the season peaks between December and March, the fact is, it often extends into May — and you can get the flu 12 months a year.

Myth No. 2:

You can get the flu from the flu vaccine. Not possible. The fact is, you can have a reaction that triggers fatigue, fever and achiness, but that’s not the flu; it’s an immune system reaction. For almost everyone, the benefit of vaccine protection from serious events compared to the risk of a serious negative reaction is 40,000 to 1.

Also, remember, the fact is, it takes two to three weeks for the immune protection from the shot to kick in. In the

Myth No. 3:

The flu vaccine often misses most flu strains, so there’s no point in getting vaccinated. Not true. The fact is, this year’s flu vaccine is pretty much on target: Nationally, the vast majority of H1N1 (100 percent), H3N2 (95 percent) and B lineage viruses (90.6 percent for Victoria lineage, 100 percent for Yamagata lineage) are similar to the vaccine’s virus components. And the U.S. Flu Vaccine Effectiveness Network’s interim estimates show that the vaccine is 43 percent effective against the predominant influenza A (H3N2) viruses and 73 percent effective against influenza B viruses. Overall effectiveness averages include people for whom vaccines have reduced effectiveness, such as the elderly and those with some chronic illnesses.

Plus, if you’ve had the influenza vaccine and do come down with the flu, the severity of the illness is usually significantly reduced.

Myth No. 4:

A new study conducted by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and published in the journal Pediatrics shows that the flu vaccine saves children’s lives. Looking at data from the flu seasons between 2010 and 2014, researchers found that getting flu shots slashed a child’s risk of flu-associated death by 51 percent if the child also had an underlying high-risk medical condition, and by 65 percent if the child was healthy. This reinforces the CDC and American Academy of Pediatrics’ recommendation that all kids 6 months and older get an annual flu vaccine. We also know it saves the lives of people with diabetes, the elderly and you.

Mehmet Oz hosts “The Dr. Oz Show.” Mike Roizen is chief wellness officer at Cleveland Clinic. Visit sharecare.com.

How do you deal with your partner’s emotional affair? Wait until this phase is over, or tell him I have noticed things? I am afraid talking about this will make me look jealous and possessive. I am not.

I feel hurt and lonely because he is distancing from me. If he truly wanted to be with her, I would quietly walk away, but that does not seem to be the case. He may not even realize he is doing anything wrong.

It is all about helping her, and being a reliable friend, etc. But he is mentioning her all the time for no valid reason, and is irritated with me much more often than before, and he does not tell things to me.

We are engaged, but I do not want to marry him if I cannot trust him. Again, if I tell him I want to break this engagement, it will look like I am being petty. And how will I explain this to my parents: “I broke my engagement because he forgot to mention something to me”? That sounds nuts. — Hurt and Lonely

You can’t talk to him because you’d “look jealous and possessive,” “look … petty” and “sound nuts”?

Please stop negating yourself! That will bring more reliable misery than your partner’s interest in somebody else. Seriously.

Your partner has withdrawn from your relationship. You can see it, you have evidence.

And, you have a life to manage one way or the other, so deal with this. He’s either all in or he’s out, no? And you need to be able to speak for yourself, especially to your chosen life partner.

So: “I want to marry you, but not when your attention is elsewhere. I see it. Please have the respect to tell me

Dear Carolyn: Carolyn:

what’s going on.”

The truth is what will shape your life from now on, so even the worst news is better than being appeased. Advocate for that clearly in both your questions and responses. Counter anything you don’t find credible with facts or observations; don’t freak out even if he admits he’s cheating; assure him you’d rather be hurt than lied to.

What you say to your parents is just so not part of this.

Please promise me this: that you won’t marry anyone until you’re ready to approach your own life as if you’re its CEO.

Different situation, but I was afraid to admit things to myself and my then-fiance, afraid I was crazy or overreacting. I assumed I was always wrong and he was always right.

Now we’re married and, though I love him, I know we shouldn’t be. We are not the best partners for each other. I wish I had been strong enough to walk away. Now I feel more stuck only six months into the marriage. Trust yourself, you are your best advocate. — Anonymous

Thank you. And pardon the unsolicited meddling: Being “more stuck” doesn’t mean you are actually stuck.

If this marriage isn’t right, then take steps — now — to reckon with that truth honestly. Hoping it will get better is a great way to find yourself decades from now looking back and wondering what else you could have done with your life.

Re: Emotional Affair: Carolyn: