Age gap concerns sweethearts

Dear Abby: I’m in my late 20s and have a male companion who is 30-plus years older than I am. We were together for a while, then stopped so we could both try to find someone closer to our ages. Neither of us did, and we recently started seeing each other again.

Although we are good for each other and compatible in many ways, we are realistic that our relationship isn’t longterm for major reasons. (I want children; he’s happy with grandchildren. He wants to travel after retirement; I’m just starting my career.)

My problem is, this time I’m really falling in love with him. Can any good come of this? We meet each other’s relationship needs in the here and now, but will the end just heartbreak? — Loving For The Moment Dear Loving: It’s time to start compiling a list of the pros and cons of this romance. You and this man are at different stages of life and have very different goals. If you really want to have a family and a career, you will have to sacrifice something for it, and that “something” may be devoting much more time to this man. Sorry, but something’s gotta give.

Dear Abby: I have a good friend I always invite to attend parties and events. She invariably RSVPs accepting the invitation, but never shows up or explains her absence. This hurts my feelings. Do I have to keep inviting her? — Colorado Hostess Dear Hostess: Allow me to offer you some insight: The woman’s behavior is extremely rude. “Good friends” do not treat each other this way. If you’re asking my permission to scratch her off your guest list, you have it.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips Contact Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.