Generations

stability when they can be with extended family members,” Pieper said. “(Kids) may end up in a different school or a different day care, but Grandma is always going to be Grandma.”

In an ideal situation, Pieper said, second-generation parents benefit from the help and “hands-on training” they receive from the older generation. However, she acknowledged this isn’t always the case.

In 2006, Regina moved back to Rockford from California to live with her daughter after Yolanda had run into some trouble with the law.

“It takes a toll when you’re grown and you’ve been on your own and you’re back with Mom,” said Yolanda, who now works at Rick’s Ribs in Loves Park and runs her own program for ex-offenders, Uncommon Steps 2 Success Reentry Program. “She can undermine my parenting. I still consider her my best friend but … we bicker and argue, and it’s not major things. It’s petty things.”

One instance was when Yolanda told Keranie she wasn’t allowed to play with a family cellphone. After Yolanda left the house, Regina eventually gave in to her granddaughter.

“Her nerves won’t allow her to hear the crying,” Yolanda said.

Aside from an aide who helps Regina on weekday mornings, Yolanda is the primary caregiver for her mother, who uses a wheelchair. Before her health declined, Regina would watch Keranie while Yolanda was at work and said it can be difficult not to step in, even when she knows she shouldn’t.

“I feel like a mother instead of a grandmother because I did a lot with (Keranie), and then I’m the grandmother who let’s her get away with stuff sometimes,” Regina said. “It is (Yolanda’s) daughter, it’s not my daughter.”