The Arizona Republic

Son gets too personal on date

-

Dear Abby: My 40-year-old son signed up with an online dating site. He has a 17-year-old son and has never been married. During his initial contact with one woman, she mentioned she had several kids and my son asked if they were all by the same father. She said he was out of line to ask that question!

I realize people today think one’s sexual history shouldn’t matter, but doesn’t my son have a right to know how many other men he’s going to be involved with if he becomes involved with her? How does one find out this kind of informatio­n relatively soon into the relationsh­ip? Waiting until he knows her better seems like a waste of both parties’ time if he’s not interested in someone who brings several other families into the relationsh­ip.

Relationsh­ips are hard enough when a man brings his family and a woman brings her family together in the marriage. It’s harder when the man and woman have exes. Each ex increases the level of difficulty to make the relationsh­ip work. Love is a choice, and it would be painful for my son to give up a young lady he really cared for because he found out after a few dates that a future with her involved four or more baby daddies.

Dear Out Of Line: Although it might be “painful” for your son to give someone up after a few dates, he should make the effort to get to know the person before asking a question like the one he posed to a complete stranger.

Your son fathered a child with a woman he didn’t end up marrying. It happens. What if the same thing had happened to her, but more than once? One would think that as a mature adult, if he had feelings for someone, he would continue the relationsh­ip and see where it led. And why are you the one who wrote to ask me this and not your son? 13 15 16 17 18 19 20

22 24 26 27 31

33 34 39 40 41

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from United States