Dance team exits over flag omission

Guess China won’t finish No. 1 in the poles.

That country’s pole-dancing squad pulled out of the World Pole Sport Championships in Florence, Italy, because the flags of competing countries flown outside the venue somehow didn’t include the Chinese flag.

Cruel and unusual

Saying “there’s lots of pictures of baseball players dressed up as Disney princesses,” Major League Baseball announced a crackdown on rookie hazings. Fortunately for Minnesota, being forced to dress in a Twins uniform isn’t included in the ban.

Quote marks

■ At SportsPickle.com: “Donald Trump to also honor professional wrestling champions at the White House.”

■ Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, on reports that Rio de Janeiro is reportedly broke just three months after hosting the Olympics: “I don’t know why, but we can rule out spending all its money on cleaning up the water.”

■ Blogger Chad Picasner, on the unveiling of a scented candle that smells like KFC fried chicken: “The Red Sox have already ordered a year’s supply.”

■ Pat Forde of Yahoo! Sports, on why there will always be a TV market for second-rate bowl games: “Because watching Eastern Michigan-Old Dominion is still better than listening to Uncle Bob rehash the presidential election, am I right?”

More candles

Happy birthday to basketball legend Larry Bird, who turned 60 on Dec. 7. And his balky back turned 87.

Talking the talk

■ Mark Whicker of The Orange County Register, on the Rams’ attendance prospects with home games scheduled for Christmas Eve and New Year’s Day: “The spectators will be more open than the receivers.”

■ Spotted on the readerboard outside Kennedy’s Auto Pro in Halifax, Nova Scotia: “Things that tell the truth: small children, drunk people and yoga pants.”

■ Brad Dickson of the Omaha (Neb.) World-Herald, after actor Kirk Douglas turned 100: “He’s busy preparing for his next starring role in ‘The Bill Snyder Story.’”

Avoiding danger

Mail carrier, meter reader and newspaper reporter were among the professions making CareerCast’s latest rankings of the 10 most endangered jobs.

Somehow not making the list: Sacramento Kings trophy-duster.

Demonized

Yahoo has been victimized by a second major hacking incident in a little over a year. Cyber thieves stole away with passwords, social security numbers and the entire Wake Forest playbook.

Gopher-broken

Minnesota football players’ boycott abruptly ended when the university president threatened to pull the team out of the Holiday Bowl. Let’s see Gopher cheerleaders yell “Hold that line!” with a straight face. Browns: Mitch Trubisky, QB, North Carolina 49ers: Myles Garrett, DE, Texas A&M Jaguars: Leonard Fournette, RB, LSU Bears: Jonathan Allen, DE, Alabama Jets: Jabrill Peppers, LB, Michigan Titans: Mike Williams, WR, Clemson Panthers: Jalen Tabor, CB, Florida Browns: Reuben Foster, LB, Alabama Chargers: Corey Davis, WR, Western Michigan Cardinals: DeShone Kizer, QB, Notre Dame Bengals: Cam Robinson, OT, Alabama Saints: Marlon Humphrey, CB, Alabama Bills: John Ross, WR, Washington Colts: Dalvin Cook, RB, Florida State Eagles: Jamal Adams, S, LSU Titans: Sidney Jones, CB, Washington Ravens: Tim Williams, LB, Alabama Buccaneers: Desmond King, CB, Iowa Packers: Derek Barnett, DE, Tennessee Broncos: Ryan Ramczyk, OT, Wisconsin Texans: Malik McDowell, DT, Michigan State Redskins: Zach Cunningham, LB, Vanderbilt Dolphins: Bucky Hodges, TE, Virginia Tech Lions: Taco Charlton, DE, Michigan Falcons: O.J. Howard, TE, Alabama Steelers: Carl Lawson, DE, Auburn Seahawks: Takkarist McKinley, LB, UCLA Giants: JuJu Smith-Schuster, WR, USC Chiefs: Dan Feeney, OG, Indiana Raiders: Christian McCaffrey, RB, Stanford Patriots: DeMarcus Walker, DE, Florida State Cowboys: Charles Harris, DE, Missouri Browns: Jonathan Allen, DE, Alabama 49ers: Myles Garrett, DE, Texas A&M Jaguars: Jamal Adams, S, LSU Bears: Jabrill Peppers, LB, Michigan Titans: Marshon Lattimore, CB, Ohio State Jets: Tim Williams, LB, Alabama Panthers: Leonard Fournette, RB, LSU Saints: Marlon Humphrey, CB, Alabama Browns: Takkarist McKinley, LB, UCLA Chargers: Mike Williams, WR, Clemson Cardinals: Reuben Foster, LB, Alabama Bengals: Derek Barnett, DE, Tennessee Colts: Cam Robinson, OT, Alabama Bills: Ryan Ramczyk, OT, Wisconsin Ravens: Charles Harris, DE, Missouri Dolphins: O.J. Howard, TE, Alabama Titans: John Ross, WR, Washington Eagles: Jalen Tabor, CB, Florida Texans: Carl Lawson, DE, Auburn Packers: Dalvin Cook, RB, Florida State Buccaneers: Malik McDowell, DT, Mich. State Redskins: JuJu Smith-Schuster, WR, USC Broncos: Caleb Brantley, DT, Florida Lions: Jarrad Davis, LB, Florida Giants: D’Onta Freeman, RB, Texas Steelers: Taco Charlton, DE, Michigan Falcons: Quincy Wilson, CB, Florida Raiders: Jourdan Lewis, CB, Michigan Seahawks: Mike McGlinchey, OT, Notre Dame Chiefs: Mitch Trubisky, QB, North Carolina