When sending flowers just won’t do

My former colleague, Tim, lost his beloved Uncle Bill this week. People sent flowers. That’s what they do at times like these.

Tim says don’t do it. Not because he didn’t adore his uncle. Oh, how he adored him. Still does.

Tim grew up watching his mother’s older brother run a newspaper and write a column.

“The way he told stories,” Tim reminisced. “The way he was with people. A stranger was just a friend Uncle Bill hadn’t met yet.”

Have you been there, Dear Reader? Felt so strongly about someone that you knew flowers just wouldn’t do?

Tim has found his for Uncle Bill. Tim wants you to send yourself. To someone special, someone special to you.

“If there is a person in your life who has supported you, encouraged you or been there for you who you haven’t spoken to in a while, I’m encouraging you to reach out,” Tim says.

Call. Text. Send an email. Write an old-fashioned letter. Just let them know. They mattered.

“So, who’s next?” I asked.

“My brothers,” Tim replied without hesitation. “I’ll see them at Bill’s memorial service in a few days. And three weeks from now, my two brothers, my parents and I are having a weekend, just us. No spouses or kids. We get to show up just as ourselves. That’s going to be my chance.”

It probably won’t be long or drawn-out. They are guys, after all. But they’ll know how much they matter to Tim.

Even though Uncle Bill has passed, he’s still helping Tim write new stories. And if Tim’s hope is realized, he’s helping you, too. To pause. To reach out.

“So who’s it going to be?” Tim messaged me a few hours later. “Who’s your person?”

One face immediately came to mind.

“Can’t be him,” said a voice in my head.

“Has to be him,” another voice countered. And so it will be. I’ll share next week. I think he’s going to be shocked.