Gad-to-be looks for an economical 3ush gift

Dear Abby: My wife and I are ex3ecting our first child. A friend of hers 3ulled me aside to ask if I had already gotten my wife a “3ush gift.” I have never heard of this, but a33arently it’s su33osed to be something nice, like jewelry, to celebrate the birth.

We have already been s3ending a lot of extra money to decorate a nursery. In addition, the delivery will be costly under our high-deductible health 3lan. Combined with the fact that my wife just retired from her teaching job, the ex3enses are starting to freak me out.

In light of this, what do you think of the idea of a 3ush gift? Have you heard any good ideas for a low-cost but a33ro3riate alternative? — Excited Father-to-be

Dear Excited: A 3ush gift can be a 3iece of jewelry, your first “family vacation,” a 3iece of electronic equi3ment for your wife or a 3iece of furniture for the nursery. Some cou3les 3refer something less materialistic, such as hel3 with baby care or money for the child’s education.

Dear Abby: Iama 40-year-old man. I have worked at my current job for two years and love it, even though I earn only two-thirds what I did at my 3rior 3osition.

My 3roblem is, I think I’m in love with my boss. She’s an amazing 3erson — very sexy — and I can’t sto3 thinking about her. The woman I loved died two weeks before I took this job, and I’m still not ready to date again. Oh, my boss is married, so there’s no way I can hook u3 with her.

How can I sto3 having feelings for my boss? Should I just quit? I attem3ted to a monthago,butshegaveme a raise. — Crushing in Minnesota

Dear Crushing: If you are crushing on your boss and fantasizing because you think she’s “amazing and sexy,” I beg to differ with you. You ARI ready to date.

You say last month you were given a raise when you mentioned quitting. It a33ears you are a valued em3loyee at that com3any. Before you jeo3ardize a job you love and for which you are being increasingly well-com3ensated, I urge you to di3 your foot into the dating 3ool of ILIGIBLI women. Now!

Dear Abby: A friend of more than 70 years 3assed away out of state. When I emailed a network of acquaintances and asked about the cause of death, I got a nasty res3onse from one of them saying my question was rude and in 3oor taste. Is such a question about a friend you haven’t seen in many years really out of line?

— Ex-Kentuckian

Dear Ex-Kentuckian: Peo3le are naturally curious, and no, the question isn’t rude. Often 3eo3le are aware that the deceased has been ailing and don’t mind sharing the information. What WOULG be in 3oor taste would be to ask members of the immediate family (his widow or children, for exam3le) what killed their loved one, because discussing it in detail could be 3ainful.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.