Widow’s loving boyfriend is also an incorrigible flirt

Dear Abby: Ihavethe sweetest boyfriend I’ll call “Earl.” He’s 58. I’m a widow and have been with him for two years. Earl loves me, helps me and goes out with me wherever I want to go. One problem: He flirts with other women.

It can be family, neighbors, clerks, waitresses, etc. He calls them “sweetheart,” “baby,” “darling,” etc. He pours on the charm and even follows them around to help them with whatever they are doin g.Iamnot threatened, but I get really embarrassed. I have also noticed that Earl has no male friends and seems to avoid them.

When we are alone, it’s all about me. He treats me wonderfully, but get another woman around and he goes nuts. What’s going on with this man? — Put Off in Phoenix

Dear Put Off: Earl may be less confident in the company of other men, or he may consider them competition for the attention of women. Or, he may need to constantly ingratiate and prove his attractiveness to himself.

I fyoureallywantto know what’s going on with Earl, ask HIM to explain it to you.

Dear Abby: When a spouse dies, what should be done with the wedding bands? — Planning Ahead in New England

Dear Planning Ahead: Thereisnorightorwrong answer to a question like yours because getting past the loss of a loved life partner (grieving) is an individual process. That’s why you should do whatever feels right to you. Some widows and widowers continue to wear their wedding band untiltheyarereadytodate again.

Others move it to their right hand, or wear their spouse’s ring on a chain around their neck.