The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
What’s behind Emma Watson’s use of ‘self-partnered’?
As actress and activist Emma Watson prepares for her 30th birthday in April, she has a response to the pressure society puts on women to get their sense of self-worth by being in a relationship with a man.
In a new interview with British Vogue, Watson acknowledged that she had started to feel stressed and anxious about turning 30. That’s in part because she wasn’t in a relationship, she said, and there is “this bloody influx of subliminal messaging around” about women who don’t have a husband or baby by the time they are 30.
While the “Harry Potter” star certainly wouldn’t use the archaic term “spinster” to describe herself, she also bristled at the idea of calling herself “single” or even of describing herself as “happy single.”
“I never believed the whole ‘I’m happy single’ spiel,’” Watson continued. “I was like, ‘This is totally spiel.’ It took me a long time, but I’m very happy (being single). I call it being selfpartnered.”
A growing number of women are using the term to celebrate the idea that they can enjoy rich, full-fulfilling lives — even if they don’t have man, according to a blog post published by The Spectator.
In fact, some women are even holding ceremonies in which they, yes, marry themselves, according to The Spectator writer Ariane
Sherine. The ceremonies may not be legally binding, but the women nonetheless go so far as to also treat themselves every year with wedding anniversary celebrations.
Sherine wrote that selfmarriage or self-partnerships are not entirely “mad, narcissistic or completely pointless.” Instead, “self–marriage is one way to embrace the reality in which ever-increasing numbers of women find themselves — wanting to settle down, have children and make a lifelong commitment, but being short of a man to do it with.”
Sherine noted that the number single women outnumbers the number of married women in the United States. Sherine also said that fewer women are cohabitating or even want to marry.
“Marriage has been on the wane for some time. But what’s new is the decline in the number of women who are looking for a partner, let alone a husband,” Sherine added.
“This is not a Bridget Joneslike tragic story,” Sherine continued. “If we can’t find a knight in shining armor, we make alternative arrangements: the act of self-marrying is merely an extreme way of declaring that there is no hole in our lives.”
The alternative arrangements include women creating their own support networks with friends and family to replace traditional marriage. “Single women may be technically alone, but we are not lonely,” Sherine wrote.