DEAR PRUDENCE

WITH ADVICE ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS AT HOME, WORK & BEYOND

Dear Prudence: My late husband and I owned a vacation home in a small coastal town, where we spent many wonderful summers and took our nieces on trips I’ll always remember fondly. But I just can’t bear to go back now that he’s gone — everything in the house and around town is a reminder of him.

I’d prefer for the house to stay in the family and have a new occupant soon who will use it often (as opposed to it staying empty for years and possibly being sold), and since my son didn’t want it, I decided to offer it to my niece, “Katie,” for less than half of its original value. She lives just a couple hours away and has two little girls, and said she’d be delighted to give them the happy summers that her sister and she spent with my husband and I.

But when her sister, “Rochelle,” found out about it, she was furious that I hadn’t offered her the house as well, and hinted that I should “make it up to her” financially (presumably in my will). Rochelle has said many times that she doesn’t want children, and currently lives across the country, working a time-consuming job.

I thought that since she has so often said that she can’t spare time for “frivolous time off” and doesn’t plan on having kids, it wouldn’t make sense to offer her the beach house, since I want it to stay in the family and be used frequently. Was I really wrong to pass Rochelle over? And if I messed up here, how should I make it up to her?

— Beach House Blues

Dear Beach House Blues: To be fair, the fact that Rochelle doesn’t have kids and works a lot doesn’t mean she wouldn’t have appreciated the opportunity to buy an investment property for half off. She very likely would have jumped at the opportunity.

But it sounds like it was meaningful to you to offer the home to someone who lived nearby and would use it for family getaways in a way that reminded you of your own memories.

You are entitled to give or sell your property to whomever you want. There is no law that says you have to treat family members equally in this kind of situation. And I think that’s especially true in this case, when the transaction was made for emotional reasons more than financial ones.

If you are close to Rochelle or become closer to her in the coming years and sincerely want to leave her something in your will, go for it. But do it only because you want to, not because she’s made a demand.