Medway family describes harrowing experience living through war in Gaza
‘I still can’t believe how we went through this. My mind is still processing what happened.’ WAFAA ABUZAYDA, who was trapped in Gaza with her husband and son for nearly a month
MEDWAY — In some ways, being back home is surprisingly hard for Abood Okal and Wafaa Abuzayda, after spending nearly a month in a crowded home in Gaza in fear of Israeli airstrikes while waiting for a chance to escape the warzone.
Amid bombardment and scarcity of essential supplies like water and food, the couple and their 1year-old son, Yousef, found themselves stuck in the crossfire of a war between Israel and Hamas. A joyful trip to their homeland to introduce Yousef to family in Gaza and the West Bank turned into a desperate quest to survive.
Their plight to cross the border into Egypt and return to the United States brought the attention of government officials, family, friends, and strangers moved by their story.
They arrived home on Monday, grateful to all who helped them return. Still, as they settle back into the home they bought here nearly a year ago, they worry about loved ones left behind, and the trauma of their experiences.
“It was 27 days of the war. For some reason it feels a lot longer than that,” Okal, 36, said seated in their living room Tuesday. “There is some getting used to [the return] to normal life... but mentally, I don’t think we’ll be at a safe point until we know the war has stopped.”
On Oct. 7, Hamas attacked Israel, killing more than 1,400 people and taking more than 200 others hostage. Israel’s counterattack has since killed more than 10,000 Palestinians in Gaza and forced most of its 2.3 million people to flee their homes.
“I still can’t believe how we went through this. My mind is still processing what happened,” Abuzayda, 30, said. “When I remember things [we] went through I start to cry... just remembering how we dealt with that.”
They had tried repeatedly to make time for their trip to visit family in Gaza and the West Bank, but busy schedules with their jobs left them changing plans. They finally were able to fly out for their family vacation in late September.
They made their way to visit family in both territories, and vacation photos taken during the days before war broke out look almost idyllic: Yousef with his father on horseback. Okal and Abuzayda seated on a porch, a view of palm trees and clear blue sky beyond. A meal shared with loved ones at Okal’s brother’s home in Gaza City.
“This was Yousef ’s first vacation to Palestine,” Okal said. “We were extremely excited about this trip.”
On Oct. 7, they were in Jabalia, in northern Gaza, and splitting their time visiting Okal’s parents and Abuzayda’s parents, Okal said. They were asleep around 6 a.m.
when they heard the first of many rockets fired that day, he said.
After a few hours, they started seeing news reports about the attack on Israel, and the couple decided to return immediately to the United States. But there were no instructions on how to return safely.
“When we heard about the Hamas attack, I couldn’t believe it. I started to poke myself — is this real, or just a dream,” Abuzayda said. “Then I realized, ‘This is real.’ ”
The family — including Okal and Abuzayda, their son, Okal’s American parents, Abuzayda’s parents, and Okal’s American sister and her three children — were forced to flee northern Gaza when Israel ordered Palestinians out of the area Oct. 13.
They had no time to plan; they scrambled to get medicines, clothes, food, water, and other supplies and to secure cars to make the drive to Rafah, where they could stay with a friend of Abuzayda’s father.
Abuzayda’s brother living in the West Bank helped direct the family members south. They became part of a human migration along local roads that had to maneuver around a surreal landscape of explosions and shattered buildings.
“You’re driving down a road where you see rubble on the left and right, and you see mushroom clouds pop up every few minutes,” Okal said. “There was no time to pause and think about it... the longer you’re on the street, the higher the chances that you’ll get killed.”
In Rafah, they believed they had made it, and that it was only a matter of time before the border with Egypt opened, and they would be able to leave.
But hours turned into days, then weeks, of waiting for the border to open. Okal described growing frustration with US government officials who sent emails to Americans in Gaza, repeatedly urging them to go to the border — only to be turned away by Egyptian guards who said they had no information about letting Americans pass.
“We were begging the State Department to leave,” Okal said.
In Rafah, life was hard, with about 40 people, 10 of them children, staying there. Among the people there were Okal, Abuzayda, their son, both sets of parents, Okal’s sister, Haneen, and her three children.
Israel had blocked supplies going into Gaza, and there were shortages of food, water, fuel, and medicine.
They ran out of milk for Yousef, who also suffered an ear infection while in Rafah. Okal and Abuzayda slept on either side of him, in case a bomb landed nearby, so their bodies might bear the brunt of the blast, they said.
Meanwhile, in the United States, family friends including Sammy Nabulsi, a Boston lawyer, were petitioning elected leaders and US government officials to get all Americans out of Gaza.
Finally, on Nov. 2, following negotiations that included the United States, Egypt, and Israel, Nabulsi learned the family was included in a list of people allowed to leave Gaza. He told
Okal, who was notified by the State Department the border would open that morning.
The family credits Nabulsi and his advocacy for saving their lives. Nabulsi said the US government should be working faster to get US citizens out of harm’s way in Gaza.
“It’s a shame [that] American citizens have to speak up for other American citizens and that their own government didn’t just do the right thing,” Nabulsi said.
Okal, his wife and son, along with his sister and her children, were able to cross into Egypt. But his parents couldn’t bear to leave their other grandchildren in Gaza. Abuzayda’s parents remained as well.
Okal and Abuzayda returned to their Medway home Monday night. But everything’s not as it was before Oct. 7.
It will take time to shake the habits they adopted to survive the war. They open taps just a crack to save water and Okal finds himself still using flashlights, rather than turning on a light switch.
They are thinking about their loved ones and friends still in Gaza and petitioning the US government to bring them all to the states.
And it’s difficult being in the United States, knowing what people in Gaza are going through, they said.
“The people in Gaza are humans. The innocent civilians are not happy about what’s happening, and they deserve to live in peace,” Okal said.