Daughter right to remove tattoo that reminds her of lie
Jeanne Phillips
Dear Abby: I’m hoping you can give me some guidance. I am a 32-year-old woman whose mother and grandmother told me about our proud Native-American heritage all my life. Several years ago, I got a large tattoo in our tribe’s language as a way to honor my family.
Recently, Mom did a DNA test and discovered that we are not, in fact, Native American. I feel betrayed by them for lying. I haven’t shared this news with my husband, extended family and friends because I feel ashamed and humiliated.
I told Mom that I would like to have my tattoo covered up or removed. It upset her and made her feel incredibly guilty. I’m not doing this to hurt her, but I don’t want to lie about the tattoo’s meaning in the future.
Dear T and C: Considering the circumstances, I see no reason for continuing to wear a tattoo that would be a constant reminder you were lied to. If your mother deliberately misled you, she has good reason to feel guilty. If she, too, was misled, then she’s as much a victim as you are.
You are the only person who has to live in your own skin, and you should do whatever will make you happy.
Dear Abby: For 18 years, I was in a loveless marriage. The one good thing that came out of that marriage was my beautiful 14-yearold daughter. My ex-wife and I have been divorced for a year now and I’m feeling emotionally available.
I have met — or shall I say re-met — a woman I have known since second grade. She was my sister’s best friend and was always around our house growing up. She was kind of like a sister, but I always had a crush on her. Now, so many years later, we have connected. This has been going on for almost a year. I feel like I’m falling in love with her, but I’m not sure how she feels about me, She calls us kindred spirits. How do I take a 45-plus-year friendship out of the friendship zone?
Dear Lost: The words are: “I think I’m falling in love with you, and I need to know if you feel the same way.” The worst that can happen is your friendship will remain a “kindredspirit” friendship. The best: You will hit the jackpot!