Husband who regrets moving to wife’s hometown must speak up

are different types of military cemeteries in this country, 135 of which are maintained by the Department of Veterans Affairs National Cemetery Administration. (None of them are located in your state.) However, there are many state and private military cemeteries nationwide, and their rules may differ from those of the national. Because you didn’t mention which category your brotherin-law’s cemetery falls under, the best advice I can offer is to contact it and find out what its rules are in circumstances like this.

Dear Abby: I tend to be a people pleaser. So when my wife wanted to buy a home for us to raise a family in, I went along with her plan to move to her hometown.

It’s almost two years later, and I regret it. I’m not happy here. I miss my hometown where all my friends and family live. It’s a beach town, a throwback to a time when everyone knew everyone and you could walk or bike-ride anywhere.

But there is no convincing my wife to give my hometown a shot as our full-time residence. Despite knowing we will never be able to own a summer house there, that’s the “dream” my wife sells to me. I resent her because she got what she wants, and I just have to deal with it. Should I just accept my fate?

Dear Resentful: I am sorry you are unhappy with the decision you made. Your wife may have wanted to move to her hometown because she felt her relatives could help out with your children, which is a plus. However, unless you find the strength to assert yourself, “accepting your fate” is exactly what you may have to do.