Neighbor’s rogue pumpkins not worth fighting over

Jeanne Phillips

Dear Abby: I’ve had it up to here with my crabby neighbor. She grows vegetables in her garden — squash and pumpkins at this time of year. Our properties are separated by a wire fence.

A few days before Halloween last year, a friend of mine brought her two young grandsons for a visit. They were excited to find a pumpkin in my yard and managed to get it into my house because they wanted to make a jack-o’-lantern. No sooner did I reach for the phone to tell my neighbor than she came banging at my door accusing the boys of theft! To make peace, I handed the pumpkin to her with my apologies.

This morning I noticed two pumpkins have tendrils that have crept through the fence and are now growing on my property. More than one person has told me, “They’re on your property, so they belong to you.” I think a fair solution is to keep one pumpkin and give her the other. What do you say?

Dear P.P.: Your “crabby” neighbor was correct. Your friend’s grandsons help themselves to her pumpkin, and it was wrong. You and your friend should both have apologized to the woman when you realized they had purloined the pumpkin, returned it and taken the kids to the store to buy one they could cut up. If you pull the trick you’re planning, you may escalate an already unpleasant situation.

Dear Abby: I volunteer for a group that supports a cause close to my heart. We’re preparing for a fundraiser, and, in an effort to get donations, I have contacted some large national businesses and some small local ones. I try to send an email if I can, so I won’t interrupt the owner during business hours.

Many of the small businesses have not responded, and it has been well over a month since I contacted them.

Would it be rude to contact them again to ensure they received my original message, or would it be better if I went in person?

Dear Welcoming Donations: I believe the personal touch is the best, particularly when you’re asking for money. Businesses are often solicited for donations by mail and email, and requests can go straight to the trash.