Check with financial adviser on leaving money to ‘soul mate’

Dear Abby: Many years ago, I had a romance with a young girl in a faraway town. After a year, thinking I could do better, I moved on. With the benefit of hindsight, I now realize she stood head and shoulders above all the others, and I had tragically discarded my soul mate.

By chance, I ended up settling in the same city as she. She eventually married and raised a family. Now and then we would run into each other, exchange a few friendly words and a hug, then move on.

In the course of getting my estate arranged, it is clear I have done fairly well in terms of money. I divorced years ago and have no children.

I have decided to leave a reasonably large sum to my soul mate. But what happens when this windfall drops out of the sky into their laps? I have no wish to cause problems in their apparently happy marriage in any way. Am I doing the right thing, and is there a better way to do it?

— “John Beresford Tipton Jr.”

Dear “Mr. Tipton”: Your letter brings to mind a television series from years ago called “The Millionaire.” Each week, the representative of an eccentric multimillionaire, John Beresford Tipton Jr., would hand some deserving person a check for $1 million in the hope that it would improve the person’s life.

Ask your financial adviser or the person who will administer your estate how to discreetly pull off an anonymous bequest, and I’m sure the person can make it happen.

Dear Abby: For a year and a half, my wife and I have been looking forward to attending our granddaughter’s college graduation. When I called my son to discuss hotel and other arrangements, he informed me that he, his ex-wife, his son, his ex-wife’s sister and the sister’s live-in boyfriend will be using all the available tickets.

I feel very hurt that the ex’s sister and boyfriend got tickets instead of me and my wife. We had planned to give my granddaughter $500 for graduation. After this slap in the face, should we give her the $500, which we have given to all our other grandchildren upon their graduation? — Left Out in Florida

Dear Left Out: Yes, you should. Although you are right to feel hurt, the blame should rest with your son and not your granddaughter, and she should not be penalized.