Picky eater vetoes all restaurant suggestions
Dear Miss Manners: I am a part of a small, close-knit group of girlfriends. We were previously co-workers, but remained very close after we all went on to different jobs. We talk constantly, confide in one another and try to schedule a girls’ night at least once a month among our busy schedules. I look forward to seeing these girls every time, and we always end up having a great night out.
But when it comes time for us to select which restaurant we’d like to go to, one of the girls always turns down many recommendations because she “didn’t like it there,” “wasn’t impressed” or “doesn’t like that type of food.”
Now, my other friends and I are always more than accommodating if someone mentions they are uninterested in eating at a certain place. However, this particular person always ends up ordering the exact same thing at every restaurant we go to, whether it’s somewhere she adores or dislikes. (It is a dish served at every restaurant due to the fact it’s usually found on the children’s menu.)
Are we enabling her by working around her pickier wishes, despite the fact that she doesn’t order anything other than one item? The rest of us are a bit more adventurous and would love to try new foods, but we do not want to all go and exclude the one friend. How should we handle this?
Gentle Reader: It is gracious of you not to point out that Darlene always gets the chicken fingers no matter what. Perhaps as a compromise, you can make a schedule where each of you gets to pick the restaurant when it is your turn. That way, Miss Manners suggests, Darlene will have to tolerate the others’ more adventurous picks – but the rest of you will then have to eagerly agree when she enthusiastically suggests “Cluck Cluck’s” or “The Golden Rooster.”
Dear Miss Manners: Some friends and I met for a birthday luncheon. The honoree chose the white-tablecloth restaurant that he knew all of us enjoyed.
About halfway through our meal, three men were seated at the table next to ours. One of the men regaled everyone within three tables around us with how wonderful, interesting and hilarious his life is. He definitely was never taught about using an inside voice. Mr. Look-at-me was getting glares and eye rolls from several tables, but he either didn’t notice or didn’t care.
What, if anything, could we have done in that situation? Nobody wanted to cause a scene, but he basically changed the tone of our lunch, and apparently that of others seated nearby.
Gentle Reader: “I am not sure that you’re aware, but your voice is carrying and we are able to hear all of your personal stories. I’m sure that you want to keep those things private.”
And then Miss Manners suggests adding a knowing and conspiratorial look – that will no doubt send him spiraling, wondering what salacious thing he inadvertently shouted.
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