Host opened the door to use of electronics
Dear Miss Manners: We hosted a dinner for a female friend of ours. After dessert, we retired to the family room to watch a onehour episode of a top-rated program. Our guest wasn’t interested, and proceeded to take out her phone and check e-mail, or something.
I found this to be very rude. Am I crazy, or have folks become so phone-obsessed that they find it virtually impossible to break free of the darn thing? ent is startlingly rude.
But you started with the electronics, without warning and without consulting your guest. You left her to amuse herself, and she did.
Dear Miss Manners: I will be 52 by the time of my wedding next month. After my last divorce, No. 2, I went back to my maiden name. Now, I’ve been thinking of keeping my maiden name and adding it to my new husband’s.
He says it doesn’t matter to him, but I’m curious what’s the right thing to do. I know the hassles of changing everything I have to change, and of course, even hyphenating will create this same issue.
I’m not sure if I would have to use the hyphenated name on everything, or if I can pick which name to use at a particular time. Can you help me, please? was long ago superseded by individuals (let’s face it, ladies) asserting their claim to be addressed as they wish. So now everyone is happy, yes?
No. Everyone is angry that others may be unaware of her choice, and disapproving of others’ choices.
You see why etiquette has stepped back. Maiden name, married name, hyphenated name — etiquette does not object to any of them. Miss Manners also recognizes the convenience of using more than one name, such as using your maiden name professionally, especially if you have established a reputation under it, and using your married name socially, to keep your private life apart from your professional life. That would not require official changes.
But she will warn that you will not be able to get on an airplane unless you remember which name matches your documents.
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