Try mindfulness to deal with life’s disappointments
When I was a freshman in college, I took a course in transcendental meditation. I was curious, plus I was looking for meaning in life, and TM was being promoted as a path to nirvana. I didn’t know what that meant, but I knew I wanted more out of life.
After a two-hour lecture, I was led into a room with low lights, the smell of incense and a small table with various statues on it. My guide said very little but motioned for me to sit down. After a few minutes of silence, she directed me to repeat after her the sound that was to be my mantra, a word I was to repeat over and over in my head. She instructed me not to tell anyone what it was, and for years I didn’t. Omm. I was to keep this sound in the forefront of my mind and use it to block unwanted thoughts. In doing this, I would remain present in the moment.
The fact is, the practice did help prevent my mind from endlessly running wild; it also helped me at those times when we feel the recurring disappointment of life. Surely you know what I mean. No matter how happy we are today, sadness or disappointment inevitably follows. This is part of what Buddha called the First Noble Truth.
Unfortunately, and all too often, we do not admit we have negative feelings. We were told as children to stay upbeat and remain positive. But none of us can always will ourselves to be happy. Buddha was right.
He was also right in saying we don’t have to accept that “suffering” (what he called this reality) has the final word. All religious traditions seek to lead us beyond the abyss.
I expect that you have heard friends talk about “mindfulness” recently. You may have even been to a session or two to learn about mindfulness. It is a practice that helps you deliberately pay full attention to what is happening around you and within you — in your body, heart and spirit.
I am convinced that when Jesus was alone in the desert he was practicing mindfulness. The same was true for Moses when he was on the mountain, or Muhammad when he was reciting the Quran, and certainly Buddha when he was sitting under the tree. When the apostle Paul exhorted readers to “pray ceaselessly,” he advocated mindfulness. There is no definitive theology attached to mindfulness; it is simply a way to stay focused on God or what matters to you.
I am convinced that engaging in mindfulness is a way to respond to the disappointments of life and the divisiveness we encounter in our fractured world. It’s a way to be at peace with ourselves in the moment and grounded in the tangible amid a world broken by so many intangibles that no single one of us can fix. Mindfulness renews our spirits, gives us the energy to pursue what we believe in and helps us bring peace to others in the world.
As a teenager, I didn’t know how to use meditation or prayer to grow beyond the disappointments of life. As an adult I am still trying to find my path. I have found mindfulness practices to be extremely useful for keeping focused on the present moment. They help calm me when despair is knocking at the door. Mindfulness is more fruitful than expecting willpower to make me happy.
I encourage you to give it a try with an open mind.
(Mindfulness sessions are held most days at Crosstown Concourse. Visit ChurchHealth.org/Calendar for more schedules, instructors and locations.)
The Rev. G. Scott Morris
The Rev. Dr. G. Scott Morris is founder and chief executive officer of Church Health.