Husband backs out of date nights

Dear Harriette: Every time I get tickets for a special event and invite my husband to go with me, he reneges on the day of. Like clockwork, he finds some excuse for not being able to join me.

I get these great, free tickets through my work. They are often for special cultural experiences, and the ticket price is high. I find myself scrambling to get someone to go with me. I know I should probably give up, but I want him to go out with me on fun dates. We have been married for a long time, and he seems satisfied with going out to dinner once a year for our anniversary. How can I get him to want to go?

— Date Night Dear Date Night: Do your best to give your husband enough lead time to be available for the date you have in mind. Sell the idea to him so that he may get excited about it. Try that next time to see if he will budge. If not, stop inviting him to these events that you really need to attend, since they are attached to your job. Instead, invite girlfriends or family members.

Meanwhile, ask your husband what he might like to do with you. Think about what he’s interested in as well. Sports? A particular cuisine? Does he have hobbies?

If you can think of something that genuinely interests him, you may be able to get him to break his habits and go out on a date — even now, at this mature stage in your married life. Good luck!

Send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Universal Uclick, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.