The many forms of love: Part II
This “Storge” story (another Greek word for love) is about the love of a mother and daughter told to me by my sister-in-law, Alice, about Sarah, her daughter: “Sarah had attended a woman’s night out at her church. The lady speaker had written a book on mothers and their relationship with their children. Some of the things the woman talked about must have touched Sarah’s heart. When she got home that night, she called me: ‘Mom, I just got home from a women’s night at church. I bought the speaker’s book and I have to tell you, that you are the greatest Mom in the world and I love you. Thank you so much for all the good things you did for me and taught me!’”
And then there’s the Storge story about three generations of nurses who loved their chosen career. This is the story my friend Mary Ann Owens told me: “My grandmother, Iva (Hess) Henrich, graduated from McKeesport Hospital School of Nursing in 1913 [a Pragma story here, as well]. She liked to tell the story of a young handsome man that was admitted for gall bladder surgery. At that time, patients weren’t allowed to eat or drink for extensive times after abdominal surgery. This patient asked for a hot water bottle for discomfort, bit it open and drank the water. It must have impressed her as they ended up getting married.”
Mary Ann continued: “Also, at the time, nurses were not allowed to continue working if they were married. But, she did continue to care for her family and friends throughout her life. I don’t know how long my grandmother was in the Alumni Association, but I do remember she was picked up by others to attend meetings, and homecoming events. After the School of Nursing closed, someone arranged to pick her up. She was told she’d receive an honor as the oldest alumni, who regularly attended the dinner. My grandmother called to tell me she was given a large letter ‘N’ from the sign that identified the nurses residence building. After her death, I became the proud owner of the letter ‘N.’”
Now Mary Ann told me her story: “I adored my grandmother and never considered a career other than hers - nursing. I graduated from McKeesport Hospital School of Nursing in 1965. In 1990, after my husband’s death, I went on a mission to the Navajo Reservation in Arizona. I learned the Navajo culture, family values and traditions. I taught health classes for the students and adults at the mission school. Before I came home, I was considered a Grandmother of one of the children. Once home, I developed a program about Navajo life and spoke to many churches and civic groups. I liked public speaking and soon learned to be a professional storyteller. I still tell stories (Navajo and others) to multiple day cares, camps, civic groups, churches, senior citizen groups and birthday parties.”
Mary Ann’s next story is about her daughter, Cynthia Mitchell: “Cynthia got a degree in Communications and one day announced she wanted to become a nurse. She graduated from Reading Area Community College RN program, in 2001. She now works in a local family physicians office. In addition, she is now the caretaker of the letter ‘N’ that my grandmother received, including her nursing pin and photos, of the nursing
school over a century ago.”
The next Greek word for love is “Philia,” a shared experience, such as a goal shared with coworkers or friends, a football or baseball team and service men and women.
My daughter, Tina, who works at a local nursing home, told me her Philia story: “I became attached to a resident who was admitted a year ago. Recently, she told me she was distraught. I asked why. She said, ‘I’m going to have a great-granddaughter. I wish I could crochet a blanket for the new baby.’ Since I knew how to crochet, the next day, I brought some wool and needles for the lady, and got her started on the blanket. Then she died and had only crocheted half of the blanket. I then took it home, finished it, wrapped it up for the family with a note about the great-grandmother’s wishes and her part in crocheting the baby blanket.”
One year I attended a Hospice Volunteer Christmas party. One lady volunteer told me her Philia story: “Because of my patient’s imminent death, the family decided to celebrate Christmas at Thanksgiving. On my visit, the lady was upset. I asked her why. She told me, ‘I have nothing to give my family!’ I then recalled my granddaughter, who the year before, presented me with a Christmas tree - her very own hand print on a piece of paper, made into a Christmas tree with decorations. I presented the idea to my patient, who felt it might be childish, but she’d try it.”
She continued: “On my next visit, I brought small pieces of plain cloth, some paint and Christmas decals, plus small frames all purchased at the dollar store. We proceeded to make enough hand prints for each of her children. After the prints dried, the hand print was decorated with Christmas decals hung on the finger tips, with a star at the top. In a shaky hand, she signed all ‘Mom.’ We then placed them in a frame wrapping them individually to give to her children. The next time I came to visit, I was told, ‘My children had tears in their eyes when they opened my present. Thank you for this ‘special’ Christmas for me and my family.’”
There are more Greek words for love, such as “Ludus” (a playful love), “Eros” (sexual passion), “Philautia” (love of the self, not ego) and “Agape” (love for everyone). An anonymous writer said it best: “Our happiness is greatest when we contribute to the happiness of others.” Carole Christman Koch grew up in Berks County and has been published in numerous publications. She has a passion for writing and has many stories from growing up on a farm to everyday stories.