Using the locker room as an example to unite us

Dismissive waves would come in, well, waves at adopting the following notion: That our country, fractured this week by another racially charged cause celebre, ought to take its cues from locker rooms. Except that it's true. What if, just for a day or two of trial, we adopt the rhythms and rules of the locker room — a sports locker room — to interact with each other?

Theo Epstein, general manager of the Cubs and the first man to deliver a baseball championship to Boston in 86 years, once described the locker room like this:

“A group of guys doing what guys always wanted to do — hang out, have fun, make fun of each other, be themselves, show off, and find some sort of conflict on which they could all be on the same side, which was tonight's game.''

On the surface, locker rooms are smelly, male-dominated sanctums of puffed up testosterone displays. Ah, but dig deeper and heed Epstein's words: finding some sort of conflict on which they could all be on the same side.

Think about it. Locker rooms, in men's and women's sports, while not always havens for decorum, are microcosms of the proverbial melting pot on which we were founded. They are diverse, often mixed with people of varying colors and cultures. Not everyone likes each other. Not everyone espouses the same political, social or economic views. Some try

harder than others. Some speak well. Some don't. Some don't speak the same language, literally and figuratively.

Just asking here, but doesn't that sound like rhythms of everyday life in Many Towns, USA?

And yet, despite all the differences, locker room inhabitants find the daily rallying point. They move closer to the village green. Their differences don't seem so significant when there is a greater good and bigger goal. To win the game. And so why can't we become one, big locker room again?

This has been a week dominated by extremists in our country. Here's my $.02: It would be amusing and naughtily antagonistic to ask one of these white supremacy groups how they feel to be the “minority.” Because they are. But they've sure embraced their Warholian 15 minutes of fame this week, using their hatred and a maniac motorist to spew their venom. But what of the rest of us? Can we work toward seeing, hearing and understanding the truth above the roar?

This is the truth: Extremists exist. They grandstand, self-promote and antagonize all for the attention they're not getting. Meanwhile, the rest of us are left to absorb truer versions of everyday life, such as how immigrants are the country's backbone and that we can extract many valuable lessons from understanding as much.

Immigrants, almost by definition, are of different cultures and backgrounds. And yes, many of them believe the same rumors, subscribe to the same theories and swear by the same omens. But they're all in the same locker room. And so if locker rooms, despite the inherent differences of the dramatis personae, work well at finding the greater good, why can't the rest of us?

It is odious, to be sure, that extremists are feeling empowered these days. But just as the rhythms of the locker room suggest, if the rest of us ignore them and unite, what's left of them? They can either try to help us with the game or remain outcasts, desperately seeking attention, knowing they only get attention if we give it to them.

Put it this way: The Red Sox won a World Series in 2004 with The Blowhard Who Used To Throw Hard, otherwise known as Curt Schilling. If they could tolerate him and unite for something bigger and greater, we ought to be able to do the same in everyday life with people who irritate us or may look, sound and act differently. Remember, this is about, as Theo Epstein said, “finding some sort of conflict on which we could all be on the same side.”

In this case, it's about stopping the hate and understanding we're all we've got.

To those who don't get this — or don't want to — it's OK. I'll stay off your lawn.

But you are always welcome on mine. As they said on the Beverly Hillbillies: Stop in, set a spell. Y'all come back now … hear? This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro.