Dr. I finds a practical use while we all battle the Coronavirus

I dle Thoughts, while waiting for bracketology, a case of Lysol to arrive and for the Yankees to get a new medical staff:

• Dr. Idle, Dr. I to his close friends, always tries to find the positive side of things. Just part of his sunny disposition. Example: Coronavirus. UConn and Houston didn't shake hands after Thursday's game at Gampel because of it. Hmmm. Perhaps our Scourge Du Jour can help eliminate the rest of those hollow (but legislated) postgame handshake lines, too. You know. Where there's minimal eye contact and trace mumblings of "good game," feigning sincerity rather than promoting it.

So let's try this: Handshakes are dangerous, you know. Coronavirus! Safety first! And let's stop them forthwith.

• Old Saybrook first selectman Carl Fortuna called out Dr. I in the Harbor News recently.

Seems he didn't care for Dr. I's take on the recent flap in town where John and Jane Ellis, who help cancer patients and their families, made a mistake and ran afoul of town zoning regulations.

"It was written by a sports writer who knew nothing about the land use regulations in this town," Fortuna said. "And what that sportswriter was saying from what I can tell is that Carl Fortuna should get involved in a zoning issue because John Ellis was a major league baseball player and a son of New London. That sounds like corruption to me."

Ah, the dumb sportswriter bit

again.

Let's try this: "Not to be a Monday Morning Quarterback, but such a narrow interpretation of zoning regulations and the unwillingness to mediate was a real swing and a miss for the town, Carl. Talk about an airball," Dr. I said. "Punishing the foundation that does such good work for cancer patients? It's gut-check time. Zoning dropped the ball. It's time to step up."

There. A dumb sports quote from The Dumb Sports Guy.

And stop referring to yourself in the third person. You'd never find Mike DiMauro doing that.

• Dr. I salutes David Kohn for his honesty upon his resignation as girls' basketball coach in New London.

Except that Kohn should never have been here in the first place. Sorry. Nobody who comes from Parish Hill knows Thing One about the kids here.

Kohn's hiring was a product of the previous athletic administration and its practice of The Minimum Daily Requirement. Happily, Phil Orbe is here now. Good luck to Kohn during his next endeavor.

• Great crowds at Mohegan for ECC girls' and boys' championships.

Most impressive: Entire ECC girls' teams came to watch the girls' finals to support the event's first foray at Mohegan. Dr. I saw the Wheeler and Stonington teams in the stands, among others. Good stuff.

• Congrats to Montville grad Cam Collins, who has already eclipsed 1,000 points as a junior at Salve Regina. The improvement in his game, helped by former Fitch coach and Salve assistant Al Furtick, is a great story.

• Speaking of great stories: All hail Unified coach Colleen Lineburgh at Waterford, named one of the Connecticut High School Coaches Association's Coaches of the Year.

Nobody loves Lancerville more than Colleen. Well deserved.

• If Tuesday Weld married former golfer Don January and then divorced him for author Alan Furst, that would make her New Year's Day. (Tuesday January Furst.) • Dr. I made the leap a few weeks ago and got You Tube TV. Fifty bucks a month. Attractive sports package.

Then he gets an e-mail saying You Tube TV can't come to an agreement with YES Network. Bye bye, Yanks.

Sigh. This is the opinion of Day sports columnist Mike DiMauro