Patricia Selden
Stonington — Patricia Marthe Selden, nee Fitz-Patrick, 92, died peacefully Dec. 17, 2023, surrounded by loving family at The Ridge in Salt Lake City, Utah. Born in Biarritz, France, in 1931, she lived for decades in Stonington, but was a citizen of the world. Patty, as she was known, was born to Horace James “Pat” Fitz-Patrick, an Englishman, and Maxine Mary Brooks Marshall, an American. She was predeceased by her younger brother Jeremy James Fitz-Patrick of Newport News, Va.
Life took her around the world, where she first lived in both Madras and Calcutta. Her father was Governor of the Imperial Bank of India. In 1939, he retired and moved the family to the coast of Belgium. A year later, the Germans had occupied France and the family escaped to England on a Dutch grain ship, just in time. Life in London was filled with air raids and spending nights down in the Underground for what turned out to be the start of the Blitz. The family moved to New York during the war, where her father was Director of Supply and President of the War Production Companies, and then British member of the combined Production and Resource Board. He was instrumental in creating the Lend-Lease program, which helped the Allies win the war. During this time, Maxine, Patty and Jeremy went to Bermuda — an island she loved dearly and returned to often. Her father was chairman of the Currency and Exchange Control Board in Bermuda until retirement. Patty went to school in New York City for three years and returned to Bermuda, where she received a classic British education. She attended Briarcliff College and Katy Gibbs, becoming an executive secretary and lived in the Barbizon Hotel in New York during its heyday. Her secretarial skills were exceptional and served her well in running her own business, “In Stitches” in Old Lyme, and organizations including the Eugene O’Neill Theater Center, Pine Point School and the Connecticut Association of Independent Schools.
She met her first husband, Graham Hay Ryder Jenkins, in New York. They were married in 1953, in Bermuda and had two children, Timothy Ryder Jenkins (Linda) and Christine (“Fi”). She had two grandchildren, both Olympic ski jumpers, Anders (Sydney) and Alissa (Phil) Johnson; and two great-grandchildren, Theo and Wren. She married George Dudley Selden in 1975 at Yale and raised George’s two youngest children, Sam (Jackie) and Chris (Linda). And so began a whirlwind life of travel with George, her brother and sister-in-law, Judy, and a wonderful group of friends. Together they experienced all of Europe, India, Panama, Tibet, Nepal, Argentina, Egypt, and Russia, to name just a few.
Patty was a world-class storyteller, dog lover, excellent tennis player, reluctant sailor, gourmand and the life of every party. No matter what time zone she was in, her internal clock told her when it was 6:01, and time for cocktails. She will be missed by a huge bevy of friends and nieces and nephews across several states. She will be a hard act to follow, truly the “hostess with the mostest.”
There will be no service, per her request, but tax-deductible donations can be made to North Shore Friends Meeting in support of the people of Ukraine, and indicating Ukraine/Kenneth Glover in the memo line of your check. Please send donations to North Shore Friends Meeting, c/o Martin Ray, 22 Rockwood Lane, Gloucester MA, 01930 USA.