ALL THE COOL KIDS ARE USING KITCHEN HACKS
After I got comfortable reading a charticle (a collection of images and text posing as an article), I got used to a listicle (much the same, minus the art, in the form of a list). Now, I am learning about — and from — hacks, often presented in both charticles and listicles.
Hacks are cool. The word comes from the realm of computer hacking — which is not cool — but originally was a quick workaround or solution, in computer code, to a particular problem.
Now, hacks are everywhere. You can find charticles and listicles of hacks for all facets of living. Of course, I especially like kitchen or cooking hacks. And they come at me, off the screen or page, like laser blasts in a video game (which is sort of the way that hacks hack anyway).
My two favorite kitchen hacks are so long in my cooking repertoire that I cannot remember where I picked them up or, indeed, if I came up with them myself.
First, I never use a cutting board without something to hold it nearly stuck to the counter. A cutting board that would slip from under my knife is about as dangerous a thing in the kitchen as I can imagine.
My wooden boards sit atop a piece of rubber matting, the kind bartenders use on which to dry glassware or with which many people line their shelves or cupboards. If on occasion I use a thin silicone board, under it goes a sheet or two of wet paper toweling.
The second hack helps keep tears at bay when chopping onions. After removing the onionskin and first layer, I slice or chop onions as hemispheres, keeping the flat side against the board as long and as much as possible. I think too many sting
ing perfumes get sent into the air because cooks like cutting into an onion as a globe.
But I’ve come across some other kitchen hacks that alleged to solve some fairly intractable problems. Some I’d heard of before, and some were of the “really?” family. But I glommed onto them because, dang it, I had some problems in my kitchen that I just couldn’t solve on my own.
What I also did was test these supposed salvific hacks to see if they did as promised. Here’s what I found.
Pulling out and cutting a piece of plastic wrap — I don’t care the brand or the delivery method — is a pain. It always seems to gather onto itself, or at least one edge does, defeating the whole purpose of having one nice large sheet to lay afluttering over that mixing bowl opening.
A hack said, “Keep the plastic wrap in the refrigerator”; doing so makes it a nonwrangler. Sure enough, the hack works. Maybe because when it’s chill, the plastic wrap doesn’t have as much static; maybe it’s slightly stiffer. Whatever. The hack is a sell.
Another hack said, “Use an empty half shell of an egg to scoop up any stray bits of broken eggshell in alreadycracked eggs.” A hack that I learned some time ago simply had me use a fingertip wetted with tap water to do the same (you and I know that a dry fingertip just pushes that bit of eggshell around; it defies nabbing).
I’m sticking with my wet fingertip. An empty half shell did not prove to be the hack’s purported eggshell morsel love magnet.
Hack three: A mix of a tablespoon of honey with ½ cup of warm water will prevent browning or oxidation on the cut side of a piece of fruit (an apple slice, say, or a “coin” of banana), just as well as rubbing the same with lemon juice or vinegar. This I had to test; not sure I like adding something so tart as vinegar to my fruit.
Well, after two hours out in the kitchen air, two slices of ripe pear treated in both ways were almost equally bright and white. Either treatment works well, with a slight edge (around the 90minute mark when the lemonjuiced slice began to brown) to the honey water.
Honey has antioxidant properties (in addition to tasting so great), which I am guessing explains this miracle. I’m using honey water now, and not only because I don’t always have lemons around. Lots of other hacks worked, too. For storage: mix fresh herbs and olive oil into a paste and freeze into cubes in an ice cube tray to use later a dollop (or cube) at a time. Keep brown sugar soft in its box or jar by adding a peel of orange. Secure green bananas in a brown paper bag to hasten ripening.
For food prep: To more easily grate soft cheeses such as mozzarella, put them in the freezer for 30 minutes prior to the grating. Using a cleaned coffee grinder, make powdered (or “confectioner’s”) sugar by pulverizing granulated. Peel ripe bananas from the bottom up, not the top down (that’s how the monkeys do it; they should know). Cut soft, moist foods (Brie cheese, for example, or justmade cakes) with unflavored dental floss instead of a knife.
But the greatest of hacks for cooks in Colorado is how to easily peel hardboiled (also called “hardcooked”) eggs. Our altitude, for all things atop the stove and from the oven, makes a difference. Here the problem seems to be the internal pressure that the inner membrane of an egg exerts against its shell. Many suggestions or hacks offer ways to loosen or make slippery that membrane, once cooked and set firmly against the inner shell.
Few work, in my long experience. But something I’ve worked on, over many boilings (and, now, steamings) does. Here’s the recipe.