Tortes, tuiles and terrines: menu items that mystify us - and why we order them anyway
Name: Let’s start with ganache.
Age: Invented in France, allegedly by accident, in the mid-19th century. Appearance: Glossy.
Why are we talking about this? Just curious - how much do you know about ganache?
I’m not an expert, but I think he plays for Manchester United. Ganache is a mixture of chocolate and cream, commonly used as a glaze in baking and confectionery.
If you say so. What about mascarpone? Do you know what mascarpone is?
If I said it was a type of eye makeup for horses, would I be close? It’s actually a soft Italian cheese. How about a torte?
I didn’t go to law school, so … It’s nothing to do with tort law – it’s a cake.
What is this, MasterChef? This isn’t about being able to make these dishes. It’s just about knowing what they are, which you clearly don’t.
What’s your point? My point is, you are not alone. A new survey shows that diners are routinely baffled by items they see on dessert menus. Only 35% of the 2,000 British adults surveyed recognised the term ganache, while only 13% could say what a tuile was.
Idiots. Moreover, 40% could not define mousse, three-quarters had no idea what a coulis was, and up to 80% would give up if confronted by the word posset.
It’s a pudding, just order it – it will almost certainly be nice. This ignorance extends to savoury dishes as well. Other surveys have revealed that frequently misunderstood menu terms include terrine (a coarse paté), crudo (raw, basically), lardo (an Italian cured pork product), and en papillote (cooked in a paper parcel).
All those words are foreign, which just shows the deception is deliberate. The confusion is by no means limited to French and Italian words. Another recent survey found that diners are just as mystified by English terms such as blackened, scalded, fermented and smacked.
I know what smacked means, just not in this context. It’s a technique that involves crushing fresh herbs with a mallet.
Why not just say “hammered thyme”? Too easy.
Anyway, isn’t this why we have phones? Again, you’re in strong company: 41% of UK diners admit to using online dictionaries to understand menus.
That’s nothing to be ashamed of. Apparently it is – 27% of Britons confessed to choosing dishes without
knowing what they were ordering.
It’s all fun until the gizzards arrive.
Unless you like gizzards.
Do say: “Le Big Mac, s’il vous plaît.”
Don’t say: “Excuse me, is the chocolate mousse lifesize?”