Shame, Documented

Leslie Contreras Schwartz

thirsty and hungry for days shame* / no shower shame / dog pound in chain-linked cell with thirty other children shame /drink from toilet because water tastes like bleach and chlorine shame / you don’t get clean clothes shame / we don’t wear tight clothes like in your country and so you get big pants shame / boy or girl and nothing else so you can leave shame shower in public while menstruating shame cannot hug my sister or cousin or friend while they scream in fear shame get to leave cell but Pablo alone now shame on birth control to avoid getting pregnant from rape at twelve while crossing the border shame outdoor time in blinding sun and heat with no cover shame when do I see my mother? and agent silence shame lights always on lights never off missed dreams shame kicked awake shame missed two meals because sleeping from exhaustionshame ran from rape and threats of torture to this place shame shackled from place to place shame try to run free shame injected for outbursts in front of other students shame the ones that become extremely quiet shame I want to die to escape this shame shame given rotten meat covered in black ice to eat shame aluminum foil and icebox cold shame coughing and hacking and nauseous shame children crying all at once can’t hear needs a conductor says agent shame hands over ears and can’t sleep and stomach growling shame no medicine for fever shame diarrhea on toilet next to friend’s head shame naked and inspected shame dirty on dirty floor with no water or soap or toothpaste shame dirty animal shame Mexicans don’t need facilities shame they shit on floor shame** I am not used to not showering and I did not sleep shame this is not normal shame when do we get to the United States says two-year-old in detention shame they did this to themselves social media post shame you and your children will die shame

these notes, documents of shame for future generations to view when they ask How did they enter this era? What door did they open? How can we prevent this human life shame shame multiplying shame and bearing children shame— from happening again? *with quotes from immigrant children and parents who were detained in the United States from the court document Jenny Lisette Flores et al. Plaintiffs vs. Jefferson Sessions, Attorney General of the United States **quote from a former supervisor when I worked as a Texas journalist