Widow eager to continue affair over phone

DEAR ABBY » I am widowed after 45 years of marriage. A male work friend of 20 of those years wants to have a relationship with me but he’s still married. We have already had incredible phone sex because he said he’s in a sexless marriage. I enjoy our long conversations. Since his wife refuses him sex and because he has been attracted to me from the day we met at work 20 years ago, what do you think about our continued phone sex?

— Good Call in Florida

DEAR GOOD CALL » To paraphrase William Shakespeare, “A rose is a rose by any other name.” So is adultery. If, after having had 45 years of a presumably happy marriage, your goal might be to form a relationship that possibly leads to cohabitation, I would urge you to find someone who’s available.

DEAR ABBY » For the last 14 months, I’ve been in a relationship with a man I adore. There’s just one problem, though, that really bothers me. He rents a room (his living room, actually) to his ex-girlfriend.

In the beginning, I didn’t feel I had the right to say anything about it, and he assured me she would eventually move.

Well, now we can’t even discuss the issue without getting upset. He says it’s financial. I say he could find another roommate. I suspect he’s just making excuses. I don’t think we can move forward in our relationship with this baggage in our way. I need some advice.

— Third Wheel

in California

DEAR WHEEL » My intuition tells me he may be getting more from his “ex”girlfriend than rent money. That’s why it’s time to ... move on.