Dad horrified by son’s movies
DEAR AMY: I am a divorced man who shares custody of a 13year-old boy with my ex-wife.
She gave permission for him to watch “The Exorcist.” I cannot imagine anyone allowing a 13-yearold to view this film.
She has allowed him to view other R-rated horror films, which are highly inappropriate for his age.
She knows I disapprove. I have talked to my son about how I feel about these movies. I have told him he can choose to watch better films, but at 13 he probably thinks it is cool.
Any advice? Do you think I am overreacting? Horror-fied Dad
DEAR HORROR-FIED: I do think that you are overreacting, but it is a natural overreaction, and it is within your rights to have your own opinion about these films.
Yes, I have watched “The Exorcist,” but there are other horror films that are much more graphic that I cannot imagine watching — or letting a 13year-old watch.
Parents should consume media alongside their children in order to see what they’re seeing. (Is your exwife doing this?)
Understand that he can likely gain access to almost anything he chooses. Also understand that his friends are influencing him, possibly even more than you and his mother are.
Explain your point of view, without coming down too hard on him. Ask him to describe why he is drawn to horror films and, yes, accept that it is definitely considered “cool” at his age to push this boundary.
At some point, your son may start experimenting with watching porn. If you are calm and maintain an open attitude now when discussing these things with him, he should develop his own cultural meter when making his own choices.
DEAR AMY: I am a 60year-old man, divorced and in a long-distance relationship with a 63-year-old woman.
My concern is her ex-boyfriend. They have been broken up for two years but still stay in touch. He changes her furnace filters, drives her to the airport, watches her house when she takes a trip and is her tech guru.
She has stated she is done with that relationship.
I believe her. She is a quality gal, and I trust him, but this situation makes me uncomfortable and sad and it keeps me guessing.
I want to be her only man, but feel the pain of the distance between us.
Should I just get over myself and realize people keep previous friendships beyond their break-up, or is this a deal breaker?
I am seriously considering moving to live with her. Worried Suitor
DEAR WORRIED: The distance between you naturally makes you worry about your gal’s other relationships.
It is not necessarily a deal breaker for someone to maintain a friendship with an ex, but you should decide for yourself by visiting her and getting to know this man.
Her openness about this is a good sign. She should also be sensitive to your uncertainty about this relationship, and reassuring when you have questions.