Sordid salon setting unsettles a customer
DEAR JEANNE AND LEONARD: For the past few years, I’ve been going to a very good manicurist at a very nice salon. Recently, however, “Linda” moved to a downscale shop, a place where the furnishings are battered, the waiting area is makeshift and the whole place smells weird. But in spite of the downgrade, Linda hasn’t lowered her fee. While it’s true that the quality of her mani’s and pedi’s hasn’t changed, part of what I had been paying for was the ambience and comfort that come with a posh salon. Should I say something? I’m happy with Linda’s services, but her fee no longer seems reasonable. A.R.
DEAR A.R.: Don’t like your clothes reeking when you leave the nail salon? Well, before you speak to Linda, think about what it will take to make things right — a new salon, or a more reasonable price? If it’s a nicer salon, there’s no point in bringing up price. Instead, you should encourage Linda to relocate to a place her clientele are likely to find more appealing. But if price is the problem, then it would be perfectly reasonable to explain to her why you think her fee should be adjusted to reflect the shortcomings of her new location. Brace yourself, though. Linda may see reducing her fee as a take-back, and a resentful manicurist isn’t likely to be the best manicurist.
DEAR JEANNE
AND LEONARD: While schmoozing with friends recently, the conversation turned to saving for retirement. My husband and I haven’t been able to set aside as much as we’d like, and when we revealed that, one of our friends said, “Well, maybe you could save more if you encouraged that Ivy Leagueeducated son of yours to get a job.” I was flabbergasted — and furious. Wasn’t what he said out of line? And doesn’t he owe us a big apology? While it’s true that we’re still supporting our son, who’s 36, it’s only because he’s very involved in social-justice movements, and he’s having trouble finding a job that fits with his passions. Renee A.
DEAR RENEE: Yes, your insensitive friend absolutely owes you an apology. You didn’t ask for his opinion, and he was wrong to volunteer it, especially in such a sharply critical manner. But to be fair, you somewhat opened the door when you disclosed that you are behind in saving for retirement. Still, a more tactful person, instead of taking a shot at you and your son, would have sympathetically inquired whether supporting him might be compromising your savings plans.
This said, we’d be remiss not to point out that the financial burden your dependent adult son represents undoubtedly
is affecting your ability to meet your retirement needs. People support themselves with less-thanperfect jobs all the time while they search for the job of their dreams, and your son should be doing that as well.
The bottom line: Don’t let your justifiable irritation with your friend keep you from recognizing that the guy may have a point.