A guide to gauge your ganja
Tips and tricks to help new users navigate a bevy of available products
On New Year’s Day, long-clandestine cannabis will join the ranks of beer, wine, mixed drinks, cigars and other adult indulgences in California.
It’s easy for a newcomer to feel overwhelmed by this new purchasing power. It’s like cruising the aisles of Costco without a game plan.
If you want to kick-start your exploration of cannabis now that Proposition 64 has given the go-ahead to commercial sales beginning Monday, we’ve got you covered. We’d like to explain what’s happened to weed since the 1960s,
when pot first began coming out of the shadows.
So here’s a cannabis primer, based on interviews with marijuana growers and retailers, physicians and drug abuse experts. We hope the guide will help you feel savvy about a plant that is no longer against the law to sell and use in the Golden State — even if you have no intention to imbibe.
Cannabis basics
Premium marijuana is sticky, fluffy, dense, leafy, covered in hairy crystalline sprinkles or fine hairs.
Only buy cannabis that’s been tested for purity, potency, pesticides and contaminants (although some of the marijuana available on Jan. 1 may not meet that standard). Look for a testing certificate. And make sure the packaging is child-resistant.
Today’s weed is the product of generations of selective crosses, grown in fertilized soil, protected to prevent wind stress and contamination, and packaged in air-tight containers soon after harvest to ensure freshness.
Finding the good stuff
Learning to appreciate good cannabis is no different than learning to appreciate good wine, music or art. The more you finetune
your senses, the better you’re able to understand and enjoy different flavors and scents. You’ll also be able to steer clear of bad cannabis, often the result of poor growing conditions or careless storage.
Long gone are plastic baggies filled with harsh and dry Panama Red or Acapulco Gold — grown in the dust, hung from hot roofs, shipped in the back of smugglers’ trucks and then warehoused for months.
Judge cannabis on these four criteria: sight, smell, taste and feel.
If the marijuana looks as if it’s been stored in a coffee can since the ’60s and smells like hay, don’t waste your money.
Types of cannabis
Just like wine, cannabis has varietals. The species called indica is short and stocky with dense buds, native to the chilly mountains of India, Pakistan and Afghanistan. Another species called sativa is tall and lanky with spindly buds. It comes from warm places like Mexico, Colombia and Thailand.
In general, indicas induce sedation and dreamy feelings. Think about the works of painter Georges Seurat. Or, in what may be a more common pot-expert reference, think “in da couch,” as in where you’ll be for a while. One toke — and suddenly it’s tomorrow.
Sativas tend to be more cerebral, creative and uplifting.
Think barbecues, outdoor music festivals or any gathering that might call for champagne.
But, like wine blends, almost anything you find at a dispensary won’t be purely one or the other. An estimated 95 percent of all modern-day cannabis strains are hybrids of the two species.
Ignore brand names when making your selection; they’re not remotely helpful. Purple CandyCane isn’t a Christmas treat. In The Pines is not a bluegrass song.
What’s inside?
The plant’s chemical compounds, called cannabinoids, also make a difference.
While there are dozens of cannabinoids, two of them get all the attention: THC (tetrahydrocannabinoil) and CBD (cannabidiol).
THC content says a lot about how relaxed, sleepy, hungry and euphoric you’ll get. CBD doesn’t offer the same psychoactive effects, but it has analgesic, anti-inflammatory and anti-anxiety properties.
Each marijuana strain can be assessed based on where it is on the spectrum of THC-to-CBD ratio. Together, the two compounds can create a balance.
There’s a third compound that you’ll hear about: terpenes. They’re the aromatic oils that give plants their smell and flavor — like limonene in citrus peel or myrcene
in mangoes.
Reading the label
Labels have a lot of technical information. But you’ll be fine if remember this mantra: low and slow. For the new consumer, “highoctane” THC is a bad idea.
While the THC levels of cannabis on most dispensary shelves ranges from 20 to 30 percent, start out with a strain in the 10-15 percent range. Or look for a balanced THC-to-CBD ratio — say, 7 percent THC and 7 percent CBD.
Start with one puff or bite and see how it makes you feel. If you’re smoking or “vaping” with an electronic cigarette, wait 20 minutes. If you’re using edibles, wait at least an hour or two. Some people “micro-dose,” just taking one or two hits on a pipe or eating a tiny piece of an edible.
Did you overdo it? Here’s the good news: Unlike alcohol, too much THC — while frightening and miserable — is never lethal. If you’re not feeling well, go some place comfortable and serene. Put on music. Go for a walk. Gaze at the sunset. Or just take a nap.
Until next time
Cannabis flower is an investment, with no hard expiration date. When you have leftovers, preserve them well. The exception: edibles. Treat them like other food items, and don’t store them for long.
Like a fine wine, cannabis deteriorates when exposed to light, heat and air. To slow down the deterioration process, keep it in a cool, dark and dry place in a glass jar or other sealed container. Plastic bags, except for Mylar, aren’t ideal because they allow air exchange.
Experts suggest storing it in a low cupboard, shelf or drawer — or in the basement. Don’t store it in a refrigerator, where swings in humidity can cause mildew. Don’t store it in the freezer, because it will become brittle and break.
Ready to buy? Remember to bring cash and a driver’s license or state ID that proves you’re at least 21. Amounts are limited to one ounce of cannabis flower or eight grams of concentrated cannabis.