The Mercury News

Girlfriend spinning out of orbit

- Contact Amy Dickinson via email at askamy@ amydickins­on.com.

DEAR AMY >> My girlfriend of three years has become obsessed with astrology.

I support her observatio­n of the discipline, but now that we are more serious as a couple, she is trying to bring me into the fold.

When Mercury is in retrograde, she complains and laments every purchase and every decision I face.

She has tried to bully me into rejecting job offers because Mercury is in retrograde.

She reads the chart of everyone who is in my life, and goes so far as to suggest who I should have relationsh­ips with, based on their birth date and time.

A chart reader once told her that because of my birth date and time, that one day I will kill her in her sleep.

I laughed at the absurdity of the claim, but she genuinely suspects that there may be some validity to it!

It’s like the past three years meant nothing. How do I help her to see that her fanaticism is driving me away from her? — Libra DEAR LIBRA >> My basic understand­ing is that “retrograde” describes the orbit of a planet when it is moving in the opposite direction to the sun’s rotation.

Mercury passes in and out of retrograde. Unfortunat­ely, your girlfriend seems to be orbiting permanentl­y in retrograde. Her behavior is becoming more extreme and resistant to rational thinking.

Your birthday is coming up. You might want to mark the new year by leaving this particular system.

DEAR AMY >> I am a single 21-year-old woman in my senior year of college. I spent most of my time in college in a serious relationsh­ip with my high school sweetheart and now I am enjoying my newfound freedom. However, my friends are having a hard time accepting this. They are desperatel­y trying to find my “soul mate” by setting me up with men.

When I inevitably reject these men, they start hurling insults at me. One man even threatened to commit suicide! Most recently, my friend “Jennifer” gave my contact informatio­n to a man who claims to be 35 but he looks more like he’s 45. I was shocked that she would do that without my consent, let alone with a man so much older! I’ve been ignoring his messages.

How can I convince my friends to understand that I am perfectly capable of finding my own boyfriends and to leave me alone?

— Single Lady

DEAR SINGLE LADY >> You quite obviously feel bullied by your friends. It might be time for you to graduate into some new friendship­s.

No one should give out your contact informatio­n without your approval. Treat the calls and texts from these potential fix-ups the same way you treat spam: Ignore. Delete. Block. You might have left the impression that you are open to this by communicat­ing with any of these men. Don’t.

Put the word out to all of your friends at the same time: “I’m reminding everyone that I don’t want to be fixed up with anyone. Please don’t ever share my contact informatio­n.”

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