Elon Musk’s girlfriend Grimes reveals her unique fitness routine
Canadian songstress Grimes — who in these parts is probably best known for being the girlfriend of Tesla and SpaceX CEO Elon Musk — posted online about her fitness routine, which seems to be one part reality, one part fantasy, one part art and three parts Andy Kaufman.
We’re not going to pretend to understand it all, except for the part when she goes to bed with the humidifier on.
Katy Perry responded: “Humidifiers YASSS.”
Maybe Perry did not see the rest of this routine, which involves a deprivation tank, astro-gliding to other dimensions, neuroplastic goals, the highest grade of red light and experimental eye surgery.
Grimes says she takes a 360-degree approach to her training, starting with maintaining a healthy cellular routine. Our healthy cellular routine involves keeping our iPhone out of the toilet. Grimes might be talking about something else.
Moving on. Grimes says she spends two to four hours in a deprivation tank, which allows her to “‘astro-glide’ to other dimensions — past, present, and future.”
We could have sworn the recommended daily maximum for astro-gliding was one hour, maybe 90 minutes tops. But Grimes knows her mind and body better than anybody else.
She follows that up with one to two hours of swordfighting. To borrow from Katy Perry, “YASSS!”
We fast forward to find Grimes in her studio, which she has outfitted with “the highest grade of red light. It is pretty much 1000 sqf IR Sauna.” Someone named Hana comes over, and the two of them engage in a 20-minute screaming session, all while honey tea that will maximize Grimes’ vocal proficiency slow boils in the background.
She adds: “I have also eliminated all blue light from my vision through an experimental surgery that removes the top film of my eyeball and replaces it with an orange ultra-flex polymer that my friend and I made in the lab this past winter as a means to cure seasonal depression,” she wrote.
YASSS!