Dealing with a not-so-empty nest

I am a woman of a certain age, by which I mean that although I’m not a grandmother I’m old enough to be one. Therefore, of course the thought of babysitting has crossed my mind as some oblique future activity. Still, I’ve never actually given it much thought.

But just the other day I received a call from my daughter, 25, that changed all that. She asked if I would pet-sit for her cat while she and her boyfriend were on a 10-day vacation. I love cats, so sure. But then, as we talked about other things, I realized I hadn’t fully understood — she wanted me and my husband to watch their dog as well.

Wait, what? A cat can be expected to hide under the bed for three-quarters of the day. But a dog? It needs walking. And playing. A dog is a needy creature.

Besides, my husband and I have a cat (mine) and a dog (his). What if all the pets don’t get along? And even if they do, two dogs and two cats is more mayhem than I’m used to at this point. After all, aren’t my husband and I supposed to be empty nesting?

When my youngest son went away to college in the fall, I worried about how I’d fill all my time. Quickly I came to realize the error of my beliefs. There wasn’t that much time to fill. What with a full-time job and a house to take care of and three kids living within one to three hours away, I am always busy. But, just so the house didn’t feel empty, I adopted a kitten last fall.

Sometimes I question the wisdom of that decision, particularly when I’m writing this column while fending off his repeated attempts to cozy up to my keyboard or pounce on my mouse. Despite that, I’m used to my kitten, who is nearly a year old now.

What I’m not accustomed to is having multiple animals in my house. And therein lies the harsh, untold truth about empty nesting: just as you settle into a comfortable routine, just as you begin thinking to yourself “ah, it’s nice to have some peace and quiet at the end of the day,” something happens: spring break, a lengthy visit, a call to cat and dog sit.

For me, the irony of empty nesting is that, rather than the anticipated feeling of having too much time on my hands, I often feel like I just don’t have enough. Take last night for example, when I spent over an hour on the phone with my son going over various options for a summer class he plans to take.

As mothers, we are always called upon to help out our kids, no matter what age they are. Sometimes that means reviewing the college course catalog. Other times, it calls for turning our house into a pet motel.

So, yeah, I said yes to my daughter. My husband and I have a longstanding agreement that our dog is his responsibility, primarily because the dog shadows him any-

way, while the cat, which requires considerably less effort, is mine. So I felt it was only fair to prepare for my daughter’s pets by alerting my husband to the fact that he’d be walking two dogs in

April. He seemed okay with it.

But then he asked, “Are both dogs and cats going to sleep on our bed?” We pondered the likelihood of this, considered how crowded it would feel, and then shrugged.

If your nest never feels empty, that’s not really a bad thing, right? Besides, it’s only for 10 days.