The Middletown Press (Middletown, CT)
‘Be an agent for change’
More than 400 kids learn how to fight bullying during rally
EAST HAMPTON — Former NBA/UConn basketball star Donny Marshall of Seattle towered over every one of the 400plus students, teachers and volunteers who converged on Sports on 66 Thursday for the daylong Rally For BullyFree Communities.
Now a television basketball analyst, the 6foot, 7inch, 230pound Marshall spoke about his experiences as a child, when he was bullied by his peers for being tall, reedthin and the child of a mixedrace couple.
He grew up in Washington state’s largest city, “a melting pot,” where Marshall saw diversity everywhere.
“We’ve got everything out there,” Marshall told those gathered on the artificial turf soccer field
“I was (called) an ostrich because I was tall, I was a zebra because I was black and white and ... an Oreo cookie.” Donny Marshall, former NBA / UConn basketball star
inside the 265 W. High St. facility, wearing bright orange “I Will be an Agent of Change” Tshirts.
The 6th annual rally, a campaign of Middletownbased Community Foundation of Middlesex County and its Council of Business Partners, sponsored the event alongside Rushford, the Connecticut Association of Schools, First Tee of Connecticut and Renee DiNino of River 105.9, the campaign’s chief ambassador.
“I was able to learn so much about the world before I learned that was how the world should be — every color, every gender getting along: skinny, fat, redhead, bald,” Marshall told the students.
“When you think of people being bullied, you think of frail, maybe no confidence or lost. I was that when I was young,” said Marshall, whose mother is Irish, and his father from the Ivory Coast of Africa.
During his career, Marshall played for the Cleveland Cavaliers and New Jersey Nets.
Students in grades five through 12 (from Clinton, Chester, Deep River, Essex, Haddam, Middletown, Durham, Middlefield, East Hampton, Portland, North Haven and Cheshire) took part in the day’s activities.
The event coincides with National Bullying Prevention Month; students, educators, business leaders and other community organizers took part in positive, empowering team activities.
“The white kids, I’ve got to admit, called me the ‘N’ word, and the black kids called me ‘white boy.’ So I was everything,” said Marshall, who said he also was bullied by a teacher in the fourth grade.
“I was an ostrich because I was tall, I was a zebra because I was black and white, and I was even food — an Oreo cookie,” he told the kids.
Dan Jaskot, owner of Empower Leadership Sports & Adventure Center of Middletown, led exercises such as a Rock Paper Scissors tournament, during which he got a massive crowd of teens boisterously cheering on their peers during a simple hand game.
Each time a student won the exchange and moved up to the next level, their peers whooped, applauded and hollered as if their team had just won the Super Bowl.
This level of engagement created a vibrant and receptive environment for students to work intensively with hundreds of unfamiliar peers in shared exercises.
A decade ago, members of the Council of Business Partners decided they wanted to focus on helping young people and getting rid of bullying, said Cynthia Clegg, director of the Community Foundation.
“It’s all about peer to peer — how do we do this together?” Clegg said, explaining one message of the day.
Students from Mercy and Xavier high schools and Vinal Tech also were in attendance.
Hailey Ledas and Finn Piper, both East Hampton Middle School students, spoke about their experiences attending last year’s event.
“It’s really good, because you get back to school, and you have such a positive mindset, so all you want to do is positive stuff,” Finn said.
“You learn to work with other people you’re not really close with instead of just working with people you know,” said Hailey.
Both teens admit bullying happens occasionally at EHMS.
“It’s not really bad, but like every school, it happens once in a while,” Finn said.
Both have employed tactics they’ve used during these events to help friends who encounter issues, such as Hailey’s friend, whom she was being targeted with cruel texts by some classmates.
“They thought she was talking behind their back, but they were talking behind her back,” she explained.
David Director, chairman of the Council of Business Partners and president and owner of Connecticut Lighting Centers, also sits on the CFMC board.
Council members latched onto the project because they wanted to encourage young people to achieve their greatest potential, he said. The bullyfree program is where members saw they could make the biggest difference in the lives of young people.
“Quite selfishly, we look at it and say, ‘Those are our future employees,’” said Director, a father of three with two grandchildren. “For me, it’s personal. I see it’s a really crazy world,” he said, knowing it’s the responsibility of adults to guide young people.
Trish Seeley, an English teacher at East Hampton Middle School, founded a community service outreach initiative, the Early Act Club, modeled on the one at the high school.
Her students have helped with a popup food pantry, the Benny Fund Run & Walk, the Turkey Plunge, Mayonnaise for a Cure and many other projects.
“Before they get to the high school, we’re giving them some exposure on how powerful it is to help others, cultivating that selfefficacy, and what you get from helping someone else,” she said.
Eighty of her students, in sixth through eighth grades, attended Thursday’s event.
“This is what I live for. I’m so present and so alive watching these kids help others for no other reason than (doing it). They’re not getting anything out of it. It’s just their inherent goodness,” Seeley said.
CT Youth Excellence Project founder Damion Grasso of Cromwell was awarded the 2019 BullyFree Communities Spotlight Award Thursday. His initiative is in its seventh year.
“The premise is bringing kids together who have experienced significant challenges,” Grasso said. Many of these young people have some involvement with the state Department of Children and Families, or are in foster care, and others are referred to him for being atrisk.
The project, which serves 10 to 15 boys per year, is for teen boys in adverse situations, he said.
“A lot of them have domestic violence at home. We put these kids with positive adult mentors and peers,” and follow up with them as the years go on. “There’s an Outward Boundtype feel to it,” he said.
For information, visit bullyfreemiddlesex countycf.org, middlesexcountycf.org and ctyouthexcellence project.com.